The Traveling Soldier

i need some rest...

2009-01-04T23:03:00.000-05:00

I realized how tired I was the other day. I was looking at a model home, and the sales person asked me what I did for a living. I told her that I was in the army, which sparked the usual barrage of questions and comments. "Thank you" "what do you think about the war" "what are your plans" and I found myself answering honestly for the first time when she asked why I wasn't re-enlisting. Its not that I can't do it. Cause I could. I could do this job for the rest of my life. It is by far the easiest job that I have ever had. I am not continuing my career for my family, yes, they did not make the same commitment I did. They did not raise their right hand and swear to support and defend the Constitution like I did. However, they have suffered through the deployments, long days, and infrequent visits. They have missed just as much of my life as I have missed of theirs. This is the only part of the Army that my recruiter lied to me about. I know that I could handle the pain of separation, and I know that if I did re-enlist, my family would adapt. I choose to honor my commitment and complete my term of service honorably. But I also choose not to re-enlist because I am tired. I am tired of living in third world countries. I am tired of puting my family second. I am tired of not knowing my nephews. I am tired of not having time to fall in love. I am tired of being deployed. I am tired of congressmen and presidents that are unwilling to encourage their children to serve, but are more than willing to put me in harms way and ask my family to continue to sacrifice (while they are further unwilling to give me and my fellow service members financial compensation that fits the sacrifice we make). Offering me an eight thousand dollar bonus for 6 more years is fu€«ing disgraceful. Kiss my @ss. I am sick and tired of being a number, an inconvenience to the medical community. I am sick of being crazy. I am sick of hurting in the morning and every minute after that. I am sick. I am tired. I want to be out of the army. I want to be home. I want to be alone. I want to be in control of my destiny. I am tired. I am sorry that I ever watched "Life as a House." I am sorry that I have put my family through so much more than they ever bargained for. I wish I was still that little boy with spiked hair and a hawaiian shirt that could run home to his mommy and she would make everything all better. I'm tired.

when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter....

2008-12-26T13:44:00.002-05:00

no this time it was not santa claus. it was me with a pressure washer....trying-somewhat to no avail-to get tons of mud off the bottom of daniel's truck. we are trying to fix his brakes, which have not worked too well since we went mudding. cannot seem to find the problem however, so i send out this request to the mechanically inclined (although i have a 133 mechanical...same scoring method as an iq test). here is the situation...the pedal has no pressure, even when pushed all the way to the floor...the brake fluid resevoir keeps loosing fluid...no visible leaks can be seen...when the truck is moving, the brakes will bring the vehicle to a stop, but over a great distance....and after spending the better part of 3 hours working on the problem, i have no other ideas. please help.

Terror, panic, and mania...

2008-12-07T16:42:00.003-05:00

I realize as the time draws nearer that i am absolutely terrified to get out of the army. For the better part of the last ten years i have been wearing a uniform, and, as i near the end of this era in my life, i have begun to accept the fact that i do not know anything about being a civilian...i am scared. i know a hell of a lot about the army. regulations, standards, and all the tinsle and glare...civilians don't do this. Chris and Tom always make fun of me at home when i start telling stories. " this one time in the army..." its all i know. My confidence comes from being the one who knows everything. i like to be the go to guy. i like knowing and being able to do.
my back has been hurting a lot lately. it always seems that when one thing gets better something else gets worse. i am finally on a medication that helps with anxiety and depression. i feel great mentally. now my body is falling apart again. i hurts to sit, it hurts to stand, and it hurts to move in between. I need to go back to the doctor, but it almost doesnt make sense to do that...anyone who thinks socialized medicine would be good for america should have to be treated by military doctors. Tricare is as close to "good" socialized medicine as we will ever get. and it sucks. doctors just stamp the paper. i got my teeth cleaned the other day. 25 mins from start to finish, and that is not a credit to the superior performance of the dentist. it took longer to clean my teeth when they were my baby teeth. these are the only teeth i have for the rest of my life and the dentist ran over them like there was no point to making sure they were actually clean. socialized medicine is crap. thats why my back is screwed up, my brain is messed up, and i am finished with the army.
i put it to my soldiers like my drill sergeant put it to me, "You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are nothing but a cookie from a cookie cutter. Fort Jackson pumps out 40,000 pukes just like you every year. You are nothing but a number, and you are easy to replace." FTA
I'm done...
sick of this s....
83 days.

The light at the end of the tunnel...

2008-12-05T14:29:00.002-05:00

I got my Orders today. There is officially an end to my term in service, and it is officially in sight. with my orders i can now begin to transition out of the military. I will be scheduling transportation of my household goods, and starting my VA medical claim. its kind of cool, i never realized what it would be like to get orders for ETS. my mood completely changed. i am ready to get out of the army. more ready than i have ever been.

For the love of money...

2008-12-02T19:43:00.002-05:00

it really amazes me what motivates americans. the things that we will do for the love of money...we marry, we slave away at dead end jobs, we sacrifice our health and well-being, there is almost no limit. black friday is perhaps one of the most gross representations of the sickness of money. a temporary worker at a wal-mart was killed because americans were greedy enough to trample someone to spend money...we have too much. 1000 dollars will allow me to live, eat, work, travel, and donate money to a non-profit organization in a third world country for 6 weeks. it costs me nearly twice that much to live here in the US for 2 weeks. amazing. the things we "need" as americans is gross. kind of makes me feel dirty. i think i need a break from being an american.

The ball is finally rolling...

2008-11-24T17:32:00.003-05:00

I am near the end...

I have 96 days until my terminal leave begins. I am thoroughly exited to enter this new phase in my life...as i continue to make my plans, they continue to evolve.

My hearts desire is to go with my sister to Ethiopia in March. She will be there finalizing the Adoption of Little O, and I have an opportunity to serve in a hospital that treats children infected with HIV/AIDS. This will be an incredible experience for me, and a huge help to the volunteer based organization Ahope. If you would like to learn more about the hospital and its mission, please visit the web site http://www.ahopeforchildren.org/. please feel free to donate, and if you would like to assist me in raising the money that i need for airfare, lodging, meals, and incidental expenses, click on the paypal link above and enter any amount.

I am truly excited about this opportunity, and would love for you to take part in this adventure with me.

andrew

working for the weekend

2008-10-11T15:55:00.000-04:00

TGIS-i love the Army. I love having to come in on saturday morning because some West Point ring knocker decided it was safer than having soldiers drive all night on fridays before a four day weekend. I love that. Really.
Going down to fayetteville to see a buddy. And stay out of trouble. Funny how that is, trouble always seems to be close to home.
I am still exausted, mostly because I did not sleep in...thank you saturday battalion release formation. But I think I will get plenty of rest this weekend. Good thing too.
50 days until my ETS Physical.

Lovin' life (or at least the prospect of actually having one that doesn't involve owning property in the Tigris River valley)

----Nothing follows----

Ahhh the blessings of technology

2008-10-10T18:23:00.000-04:00

I have just recently figured out how to post using my new phone...so now I have absolutely no excuse for not posting.
This week has been a living hell. Three long months of planning went straight down the toilet, because a few key players didn't do their job. I have almost completely lost all of my motivation. The only encouraging thing that happened this week was that I realized I had mis-calculated the days until I come home from the army. 141 days remaining in my service to the country. 141 days of supporting and defending the Constitution of the United States. 141 days of waking up tired and coming home exhausted. 141 days. Start the chain @ 100 and tear a link off every day.

I'm tired, sad, lonely, and I want to come home.

I love it when a plan comes together...

2008-08-24T10:36:00.002-04:00

Well, the party has passed, and i no longer have to deal with the daily changes. A great stress has been lifted. The party went well, and so did the fund raising. now i get to focus my attention on more planning...i guess that is the problem with working in the S3 shop. I think i should accept that my job is plans...and like the A-team, myself and my co-workers have a lot of work to do-I love it when a plan comes together!
aj

Long time, many adventures

2008-08-20T14:11:00.002-04:00

work has been incredibly busy. my partner in crime has started school in the afternoons, so i am left with a lot more afternoon work. it has been an adjustment, but i think that i am coping well enough. there has been a lot going on here at work, most of which i am not allowed to discuss in this forum, but others i can. i have been the primary coordinator for the company party. i never realized how much added stress party planning (on a very limited budget) could be. no wonder people pay for planning services. unfortunately for me, i am paid-and the commander sees that as enough compensation.
Battalion keeps coming up with last minute changes, but expects us to plan 8 weeks out. it really throws a wrench in the works, and makes for a very difficult planning effort. i wish that they would stick to the same timelines that they are imposing on us. it would really make for a fluid transition.
I am really ready for some time off, and, maybe, just maybe an early return to the fine State of Colorado. MO you can tenatively plan for a date around your birthday plus 2....but i will give you better hard times around the date.
I love you all and miss you very much.
AJ

196 Days till i come home...i hope.

2008-07-22T07:46:00.002-04:00

"24"
Twenty four oceans
Twenty four skies
Twenty four failures
Twenty four tries
Twenty four finds me
In twenty-fourth place
Twenty four drop outs
At the end of the dayLife is not what I thought it wasTwenty four hours ago

Still I'm singing Spirit take me up in arms with You
And I'm not who I thought I was twenty four hours ago
Still I'm singing Spirit take me up in arms with You

Twenty four reasons to admit that I'm wrong
With all my excuses still twenty four strong
See I'm not copping out not copping out not copping out

When You're raising the dead in me
Oh, oh I am the second man
Oh, oh I am the second man now
Oh, oh I am the second man now

And You're raising these twenty four voices
With twenty four heartsWith all of my symphonies
In twenty four parts
But I want to be one today
Centered and trueI'm singing

Spirit take me up in arms with You
You're raising the dead in me
Oh, oh I am the second man
Oh, oh I am the second man now
Oh, oh I am the second man now

And You're raising the dead in me
I want to see miracles, see the world change
Wrestled the angel, for more than a name
For more than a feeling
For more than a cause
I'm singing Spirit take me up in arms with You

And You're raising the dead in me
Twenty four voicesWith twenty four hearts
With all of my symphonies In twenty four parts.
I'm not copping out. Not copping out. Not copping out.

We few, we happy few, we band of brothers...

2008-07-19T23:03:00.004-04:00

I've had some time to myself lately, and realize that i am really ready to get out of the army. I get really frustrated with the army politics, and no matter how much i attempt to make a change, or adjust my life to be less affected by the chaos that results, i can no longer tolerate the bad taste that is left in my mouth.

the Sergeant Major of my battalion told me (non-specifically, but never the less a shot fired in my direction) that, because i was un-willing to re-enlist, that i was doing a great disservice to my country, and that i was failing the soldiers that fall underneath me. I work hard day in and day out to ensure that my soldiers are taken care of, and that training is conducted to standard. To hear this man diminish my performance due to his un-realistic expectations for retention was truly diheartening. The problem with this situation is that it is not an isolated event. this is epidemic among the senior leadership of the Army. The sustained war in Iraq is weighing heavily on the spirit of the American Soldier. I have been to Iraq for a total of 26 months since joining the army 5 years ago. That is 26 months of time lost with my family that i will never get back. when i sit and think about this, i am, most of the time, brought to tears. The physical and mental injuries that i have sustained are with me daily. I cry alot. My back constantly hurts. I am always anxious.

There were times in my life when i loved to be the focal point in a crowd. I was constantly trying to be the center of attention. that was when i was happiest. All eyes on me. I spend a lot of time alone now. I like to have time to myself. Time to think. I am most calm when i am by myself. I go to Group therapy 2 times a week, and talk with people who have become friends. My doctor has diagnosed me with CPTSD (combat post traumatic stress disorder). The way i see it, I am a normal person, who was exposed to abnormal circumstances, and is having a normal reaction to them. Wierd things happen to the human mind when exposed to combat situations. confronting death (your own or others) on a daily basis is not healthy.

My last rotation in Iraq put me on what could best be described as the "front lines" of the war in Iraq. Asymetrical warfare is that in which there is not a line of combat. it happens all around. we imprison ourselves on heavily defended camps, and pray that the soldiers on the perimeter stay awake. i was the one on the perimeter. the keeper of the gate. I had to search dead bodies for weapons. i had to treat bleeding civilians. i had to asses wounded. the smell of death is branded into my mind. it haunts me in my sleep, and it creeps into my mind and crowds my thoughts during the day.

I don't know how long i will suffer from this affliction. I am not worried about whether or not i will ever feel "normal" again. God has promised me that will not be the case. "For i know the plans that i have for you says the lord. Plans for good, and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." I have a future. and it is not in the army.
I have given some of the best years of my life to serve my Country.

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.
-Thomas Jefferson.

Agatha Christie...

2008-05-21T18:07:00.004-04:00

No I was not killed by the butler in the library with the candlestick...

what an amazing month this has really been. this is the first month of my fifth year in the army. it has been a month packed with training, work, and reflection.

Training-

I spent the first part of the month at Fort Campbell attending the Sabalauski Air Assault School. It was probably the most intense training that i have ever done in the Army. It was physically challenging, emotionally challenging, and mentally tough. There were several times that i wanted to quit, but, through encouragement from my family, i was able to make it through the school...i am now certified to run a lane on a repel tower, and, of course, repel out of helicopters.

The time that i spent at Campbell gave me a chance to break out of my comfort zone and take a good look at what was going on in my life. This assesment gave me the courage to step out of my comfort zone and seek some counseling from a christian. God really works in mysterious ways. Just as i was broken by physical, emotional, and mental trial, my group therapist was able to finally get approval to do joint counseling with the chaplains office. Today was my first session, and it was wonderful to hear the word of God as counsel.

Work-

work has been crazy, just as i returned from school my colleage was sent on a mission. no time to catch up and balance out the work load. this was an unfortunate consequence of our job, but i am up to the task.

We had a lot of Safety training this week and last. There were a couple of preventable accidents that led to a soldier's death.

Reflection-

even though i have had very little time for me to sit down and reflect. i have been working on some new techniques of clearing out what i don't need to focus on. "let go, let God"

It is a good feeling to have the peace of God wash over you. the peace that passes understanding.

sorry it took me so long to post, i will make it an effort to keep you posted.

Epididymitis....

2008-03-30T12:47:00.003-04:00

it may be a tongue twister, but that's what the ER Doc says that i have. i went to the emergency room on thursday night, because the family jewels were in excruciating pain. two short hours later, an ultra-sound, and quick check for hernia, and i was on my way out of the ER with scrips for vicodin and doxycycline. Thank you Moldy-Mary, doing much better now. i still feel like i got a quick kick in the junk, but i am getting better.

it was a big week for me. lots of preparation. we are getting ready for weapons qualification, and there is a lot of work for the training room whenever this happens. nothing like putting cold hard lead downrange.

looking forward to jamboree!

all for now.

And the Army goes rolling along!

2008-03-19T20:36:00.002-04:00

Back in the loop, and sorry for the absence. i have no adequate excuse, so i will spare you the typical Private banter.
I am thoroughly excited at the prospect of next month. after a twenty month long ordeal, all of the problems with my promotion packet are fixed, and i am eagerly awaiting the publishing of the cutoff score for april. perhaps, perhaps, perhaps i will be a sergeant on the first. give or take thirty days. (this is a government agency).
Quarterly training brief is finally over. (that was one of the lame excuses that i had to offer, but decided to store) and i am finally getting home before seven at night. quite the hassle for me, but at least i had plenty of company and the staff in the office was much more prepared this time around.
I was watching the news, and caught a story about how the Air Force is struggling with the extension of their long and arduous tours in iraq (currently four months long), and came to the realization that the secretary of the Air Force must have had a little fuzz in his ears when President Bush declared a "War on Terror" and must have understood it to be a "War on Tourism" the Air Force certainly has us protected at the most popular tourist destinations worldwide (while the Marines(currently performing 8 month tours) and the Army (currently serving 15 month tours) are carrying the brunt of the war upon their tattered shoulders.) Off we go, into the wild blue yonder!

We have seen a lot of new faces around the company as the rotation begins letting the old go and the new come. stop loss is over, and its nice to have new people to talk to....i was begining to think that if i heard the same lame joke one more time i would snap....funny....the same joke just sounds so much different when it comes from a new persons mouth.

all for now.....i hope you are a little satisfied with this installment, i promise more are to come!

what a week-oh, wait it hasnt started yet

2008-02-23T11:24:00.001-05:00

what a crazy week i have ahead of me. i will be off the radar for the whole week, and that really doesnt change my posting schedule much. i seem to not find any time during the week to post-i am working on that.

my company commander, and all of my supervisors have decided that they can no longer wait on Department of the Army to fix the issues resulting from the roll out of the new promotion points system and will be promoting me to corporal on monday. it is exciting for me, because 1.) i will now be considered a non-commissioned officer, but 2.) i will also start getting rated for the work that i am already doing in my current position.

an added benefit is that i can also start making more jokes about the movie major payne.

things continue to heat up around the world, and this concerns me. as much as i would like to visit macedonia, i would prefer to do that as a civilian tourist. pray that there will be a steady decrease in violence worldwide, and that cooler minds will prevail over the heated call to violence.

wow-has it really been that long?

2008-02-18T14:57:00.002-05:00

i did not realize that i had not posted in such a long time. a thousand apologies. at any rate-here is the latest.
Lent started two weeks ago, and i gave up alcohol. I am using this time to reflect on what is important to me, and how drinking on any basis is taking away from that. sort of an act of self-discipline. things are going well on that front, i only think about it occasionally and that is because i bought beer on the monday before lent. so i have a full 12 pack sitting on the counter. in the mouth of temptation and sticking true to my goal.
i am excited about NC, but apprehensive of the feasability. i will keep you posted.
things are going well at work, and i am busier than i think i have ever been. there is a lot of training that needs to be completed prior to our next deployment. no one knows when that is, so we are training like mad-as if we were leaving next month...it is an effort to always remain prepared. it is our responsibility to the taxpayers. (and being one myself, i want the most out of my money)
i think i will close this post out and take a nap...taxpayer money hard at work...

Thomas Jefferson

2008-02-05T19:45:00.001-05:00

"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them."

The State of the Union is fragile at best...

2008-02-05T19:13:00.000-05:00

Now-the long awaited thoughts on the state of the union address. although i thought most of the speech was the typical political rhetoric that we expect from an address of this type, there were a few points that i thought were particularly effective in communicating a clear political message. His talk about the War on Terror will largely be ignored, because he is the source of the informations, however true it may be.

His emphasis on the individual in the political machine was particularly strong. unlike hillary's claim that it takes a village, the president insists that it takes an individual. similar to the founding father's ideal that the individual is the key to political justice.

"In the work ahead, we must be guided by the philosophy that made our nation great. As Americans, we believe in the power of individuals to determine their destiny and shape the course of history. We believe that the most reliable guide for our country is the collective wisdom of ordinary citizens. And so in all we do, we must trust in the ability of free peoples to make wise decisions, and empower them to improve their lives for their futures. "

it takes an individual to control the machine, it takes an individual to stand up to injustice, it takes an individual to prevent 1984.

i particularly liked how the president differentiated between a peace-keeping operation and the true definition of the battle in which we are currently on the front lines.

"We are engaged in the defining ideological struggle of the 21st century. The terrorists oppose every principle of humanity and decency that we hold dear. Yet in this war on terror, there is one thing we and our enemies agree on: In the long run, men and women who are free to determine their own destinies will reject terror and refuse to live in tyranny. And that is why the terrorists are fighting to deny this choice to the people in Lebanon, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, and the Palestinian Territories. And that is why, for the security of America and the peace of the world, we are spreading the hope of freedom.

it is essential that we continue to fight on the front lines of tyranny and injustice, regardless of the monetary cost, regardless of the lost family time, regardless of the economic struggle. "The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." -Thomas Jefferson

By trusting the people, our Founders wagered that a great and noble nation could be built on the liberty that resides in the hearts of all men and women. By trusting the people, succeeding generations transformed our fragile young democracy into the most powerful nation on Earth and a beacon of hope for millions. And so long as we continue to trust the people, our nation will prosper, our liberty will be secure, and the state of our Union will remain strong.
So tonight, with confidence in freedom's power, and trust in the people, let us set forth to do their business. God bless America.

Baby you can drive my car

2008-02-03T12:40:00.001-05:00

2008-02-03T12:32:00.000-05:00

Baby you can drive my car!! yes, when i am driving in my new car, i do feel like a star. this is the latest addition to my life. a 2006 chevy impala (don't worry, it's not the SS edition). i got a great deal on it, and i am looking forward to driving it for the next few years.

i just thought you might like to see some pictures so that you would be able to see what i am rolling around in. the car is in great shape, clean, and runs great. i cannot wait to drive down to charlotte to visit the fam while they are in town.

let me know what you think of the car, and anything else you want to know.

State of the Union

2008-01-28T18:43:00.000-05:00

i am really excited for the state of the union address. i will post my thoughts after the address.

Benevolent taxpayers...

2008-01-27T21:56:00.000-05:00

just to answer your question MO...the benevolent taxpayers of this fine nation pay the salaries of myself and those in command over me. those in command over me enjoyed the many days off over the holiday season, and wanted to carry that on through the new year.
but dont worry, it was also those wise taxpayers that purcheased the software that compiles the training database and allows me to log in while i am at home. so, even when i am at the house, i am still doing work from the office that i was unable to finish while at work.
i was hoping, however, to get a shout out for the title of my last post.

Working For The Weekend
by Loverboy

i mean doesn't anyone else feel like this?

2008-01-27T21:54:00.001-05:00

Everybody's working for the weekend...

2008-01-26T11:12:00.000-05:00

i am really glad that the weekend is finally here. next day of work is 4 feb.

8 hours

2008-01-23T20:01:00.000-05:00

eight hours. tomorrow i get eight, uninterupted, dedicated hours to work. i don't think that i have ever been this excited. what kind of a nerd am i. the biggest excitement in my life is getting to work.
as i recall, i said appearent. i did not call it suicide. but L i agree. in the end the result is the same. but the end doesnt justify the means. when in rome. (i guess i just dont really understand the saying.)

what a day...

2008-01-22T19:24:00.000-05:00

i dont think that i had 5 minutes of down time at all today. four day weekends are just too much time away from work...maybe i shouldnt tell you taxpayers that.

it seems to me that my life wasnt the only one that was busy. dow jones, the fed, and hollywood were all really busy. Today was the worst opening for the Dow Jones industrial average in quite some time; the federal reserve bank announced an early, and unexpected interest rate drop-to stave off an impending recession; and Heath Ledger's, in an appearent suicide, was found dead of an appearent drug overdose. what a day what a day. if this was the beginning of my week i can only imagine what can be expected of the end of the week. i have a full agenda all week, and another long weekend ahead of me. then i am off to learn how to tie knots and certify loads for sling-load transport. i am really excited about that.

hope that everyone is well, and i look forward to more posts from all of you. Mo-you might try to get uncle gil to start blogging, i think that he would really enjoy the routine.

Robert F. Kennedy's Statement on Dr. King's Death - Montage

2008-01-21T09:14:00.001-05:00

I have a dream...

2008-01-21T08:51:00.001-05:00

here's to dreaming...

2008-01-21T08:43:00.000-05:00

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source - Share This
dream /drim/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[dreem] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation noun, verb, dreamed or dreamt, dream·ing, adjective
–noun
1.
a succession of images, thoughts, or emotions passing through the mind during sleep.
2.
the sleeping state in which this occurs.
3.
an object seen in a dream.
4.
an involuntary vision occurring to a person when awake.
5.
a vision voluntarily indulged in while awake; daydream; reverie.
6.
an aspiration; goal; aim: A trip to Europe is his dream.
7.
a wild or vain fancy.
8.
something of an unreal beauty, charm, or excellence. –verb (used without object)
9.
to have a dream.
10.
to indulge in daydreams or reveries: He dreamed about vacation plans when he should have been working.
11.
to think or conceive of something in a very remote way (usually fol. by of): I wouldn't dream of asking them. –verb (used with object)
12.
to see or imagine in sleep or in a vision.
13.
to imagine as if in a dream; fancy; suppose.
14.
to pass or spend (time) in dreaming (often fol. by away): to dream away the afternoon. –adjective
15.
most desirable; ideal: a dream vacation. —Verb phrase
16.
dream up, to form in the imagination; devise: They dreamed up the most impossible plan.
[Origin: 1200–50; ME dreem, OE dréam joy, mirth, gladness, c. OS drōm mirth, dream, ON draumr, OHG troum dream; modern sense first recorded in ME but presumably also current in OE, as in OS] —Related forms
dreamful, adjective
dream·ful·ly, adverb
dream·ful·ness, noun
dream·ing·ly, adverb
dreamlike, adjective
—Synonyms 1. Dream, nightmare, and vision refer to the kinds of mental images that form during sleep. Dream is the general term for any such succession of images. A nightmare is a dream that brings fear or anxiety: frightened by a nightmare. Vision refers to a series of images of unusual vividness, clarity, order, and significance, sometimes seen in a dream.
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.

i love lamp...

2008-01-20T21:19:00.000-05:00

i think i am finished with a painting. it was inspired by an experience that i once had. the title of the painting is Al Hillah. it is oil on canvas. this week has been a tough one mentally, but the good news is that i am a government employee that is on a four day weekend. sometimes i get really tired of my job, and then others i cannot see me doing anything else. i ruined another painting experimenting with a technique. it was unsuccessful, so i will have to start over. oh well, there is no shortage of oil paint, and it will give me some more time to work on the entire series. i was rushing the painting a little bit.L-as per your request, i have included another pic of jack. he was a little tired, and wanted me to go to bed, but i had a post to put up. you can see my new painting on the wall behind jack. i dont think he understands the importance of his location. he is in the center of my studio/bedroom/gallery. he should feel really important.

i played the new video on your blog L, and jack perked up and looked sideways at the computer screen wondering how you were inside the little black box. i thought noah was adorable. i love you.

short work week ahead of me, and next week i will be in school all week. learning how to tie nots and certify loads for sling operations. ILY IMY SWAK

2008-01-15T20:12:00.001-05:00

in·ex·tri·ca·ble
play_w("I0124300")
(n-kstr-k-bl, nk-strk-bl)
adj.
1.
a. So intricate or entangled as to make escape impossible: an inextricable maze; an inextricable web of deceit.
b. Difficult or impossible to disentangle or untie: an inextricable tangle of threads.
c. Too involved or complicated to solve: an inextricable problem.
2. Unavoidable; inescapable: bound together by an inextricable fate.

Logon...

2008-01-15T20:01:00.000-05:00

i think it really aggravates me that i have to log on. i have one log on for my blog, one for my computer at work, one for my email, another for my work email, one for my yahoo, one for my xbox live, one for my credit card, one for my bank account, one for my other bank account, it seems like every place that i go they give me a new log on. don't they know that i have like fifty already.

I'm done logging on. this is crap.

OK so that is not really practical, but you get the point. when did our lives become so inextricably attached to technology, and why can't Microsoft, copyright, do some thing about this.

i think I'm getting carpel tunnel syndrome just from logging in to all of my accounts once a day.

Department of the army will be publishing the promotion point cutoff scores for the month of February this week, we are hoping for a drop to around 622, this is possible, and my points are higher than that. right now the points are at 798, and have been for the last 3 months. there are 725 soldiers in my job specialty that are eligible, and i want to be selected.

keep your fingers crossed, but no promises.

The struggles of the daily grind...

2008-01-08T18:12:00.000-05:00

i cant remember the last time that i had time for a lunch break at work. it seems like everytime we catch up, our higher headquarters puts out another standard that sets us hopelessly behind. after talking with L, i have realized that this is the game of the army. the constant give and take, that being they give us more than we can take, is just the way that it rolls. COL McGee once spoke to me about the Law of Probable Dispersal, which states, "Whatever hits the fan, will not be evenly dispersed." i guess i just end up being at one of the major collection points, most of the time.

L & B's adoption progress is something of excitement for me. i am excited at the prospect of going to the horn of africa for the pickup day. little o has no idea what a wonderful family is waiting for her. i scream with joy-sometimes internally, sometimes externally-each time that i think about it.

P's ultrasound gives me the same amount of excitement. the little peanut that is soon going to be a walking, talking, reasoning child has no clue what is in store. the prospect is amazing.

i have started oil painting in full swing and that is why i have not been posting as much lately. however-i promised mimi and cobra that i would put at least one post a week, and i think i have kept up...dont sue me if i missed a couple.

little n is excited for mimi to visit chi-town. co-co, the name change will only be temporary, but i think little n's adaptation is still acceptable.

this is a picture of one of my current painting projects, but it is still in progress-so please be kind...

Christmas and New years

2007-12-31T19:40:00.000-05:00

holidays were rough for me this year, i was the only person in my office that did not go on vacation, so i had to pick up the slack from everyone being gone. my work day was extended from 8 to working nearly 12 hours every day...but i have gained the knowledge that i need to really do my job well.
i was able to fly home to CO for the christmas weekend. the holiday was fun and was a nice escape from the daily grind. it is kind of nice to have a 9-5 job. much less stressful. while i was home i got to see my nephew cody. he is getting so big and is walking all by himself. look away for 3 seconds and he is nowhere to be seen.
when i got back to virginia, my sister leah called and dropped in for a suprise health and welfare inspection. she was impressed that i was living clean, i just told her not to open the closet. (just kidding)
Work starts in full days on the 2nd and i am happier than a pig in s---. everyone will be back from vacation and the highway of my responsibility goes from a 12 lane superhighway to a two lane country road.
more later
aj

2007-12-26T17:58:00.000-05:00

Hey L...here are some photos of your first born so that you can enjoy them... i got jack a carhart jacket for his christmas present...ill put some video next time i get a chance.

i cannot wait for QTB to be over...

2007-12-08T08:27:00.000-05:00

i have been working some long hours, and really havent accomplished much. change this one day, change it back the next...could we all get on the same page?

busy day...

2007-12-03T20:51:00.000-05:00

my credit card was stolen...not happy, but glad that USAA caught it. i certainly had not yet. my finances are frozen right now, but it should be cleared up by the end of the week-i hope. good thing i have two banks and enough money to get through the freeze.
in class most of the week learning the new training database for the army. boring. at least this will get me out of fall cleanup. classroom beats rake anyday. ily imy -ticket and itinerary is on hold, ill let you know.

2007-11-26T09:46:00.001-05:00

Looks like somebody has a case of the mondays!!!

2007-11-26T09:40:00.000-05:00

our battalion commander was more than gracious on wednesday of last week when he let us go home at noon, but he elevated himself even further when he said that first formation on monday was not until 1200. i think that every monday should start at noon. it would make the work week so much more bearable.
busy week, i have group this afternoon, and, boy, do i have plenty to talk about. ill let you know how it went.
i almost cried yesterday because i went on a walk with jack and he would not poop. that is not normal.

back in the saddle, however uncomfortable that may be...

2007-11-25T09:59:00.000-05:00

we are most definately back from iraq, and have already begun to prepare for major changes at Ft Lee. our unit was annexed by 101 airborne, and by the first of the year, we will have all the associated flair of the 101-including the screaming eagles patch, and the rapid deployment schedule.
since my return, i have taken up a desk job and started pushing papers. i like the new job, and i have found that the work is right up my alley. i work in training, and i am now responsible for the training management of the entire company. i get to work all day long, with very little down time, and that suits me just fine.
Jack moved to the south with me for the winter. it is very theraputic for me to have a dog right now. he is always willing to listen to my problems, no matter what time of day, he doesn't force his opinions on me, and gives me all the attention i need. in return, all he asks for is that i walk him 2 times a day, and keep his food and water bowls full. its just the right amount of responsibility.
living off post has proved to be the best thing for me right now. it has given me time away from the army, and i think that is what i need. we have a nice little 3 bedroom house with a huge back yard, and really nice owners. it is an oasis that is only ten minutes away from work.
i have resumed full time therapy and attend group sessions with other soldiers diagnosed with PTSD. i, like denny crane, have no problem telling people that i am crazy, and my straight forward attitude towards my mental illness has already helped 3 people who would not have gone to get help. so in a way, i am crazy to help crazy people get help.
all for now.
more to come.
andrew

Oh, the Beauty....

2007-09-19T12:31:00.000-04:00

I have returned to terra americana...or something like that. I arrived back into the continental US monday morning, and, boy, does it feel good to be back...things have been non-stop action, and i have been slowly getting everything back online for myself.
Every morning i have been awakened to the same blaring alarm clock, but for some reason it sounds so much better now that it is in America. I really forgot how fast internet is here in America, and for some reason it still amazes me that i dont have to wait for thirty minutes to have a page load...
I am still getting back in touch with everyone, but i have the same phone number that i had before i left, leave a comment if you need the phone number.
all for now
andrew

Free at last....

2007-09-14T05:09:00.000-04:00

Today i would like to write a tribute to my Father....
The more time that i spend in this crazy world, the more i realize what a great father i really have. He has always been there for me, and he has always listened to my problems-no matter how trivial they actually are-and he has always worked very hard to provide a better life for me. Sometimes it amazes me to see how many people have absent fathers, or fathers that really don't care for them the way that my father does. He has been an excellent example for me to follow. He is a good Christian man, and he is one that is more of a man than anyone that i have ever met. My greatest hope is that when i grow up, that i am just like my father.
Happy Birthday Dad...

I forgot-over the last year-how much i really hate the sand in Kuwait, but i won't have to suffer through it very long.
I love you all and miss you soooooo much.

I need a sign...to let me know you're here.

2007-09-09T11:27:00.000-04:00

I need a sign, to let me know you're here.
All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere.
I need to know that things are gonna look up...
'cause i feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup.
And there is no place safe, and no safe place to put my head.
when you can feel the world shake from the things i've said,
and im calling on angels. i wont give up if you dont give up.
I need a sign to let me know you're here.
'cause my tv set just keeps it all from being clear.
I want a reason for the way things have to be,
i need a hand to help build up some kind of hope inside of me.
and im calling on angels,
when children have to play inside so they dont disappear,
while crowded aisles see marrige lies, 'cause we dont talk for years,
and football teams are kissing queens and loosing sight of having dreams,
in a world where what we want is only what we want until its ours
and im calling on angels. i wont give up if you dont give up.

Questions make me tired...

2007-09-03T10:15:00.000-04:00

I know that i need to go on vacation, because my job is to answer questions, but i get annoyed at people when they ask me questions. is it bad to have nightmares about your job when there is nothing that you do at work that should make you have nightmares. take for example-i had a dream the other night, that i needed to accomplish a task at work, and no matter what i did, i could not get it done. everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. i felt overpressured, and really stressed out-then i woke up and realized i was in my bed. i need a vacation.

I hate schedules.....

2007-09-01T03:50:00.000-04:00

I dont know quite why anyone makes schedules. everything should be run by a shoot from the hip kinda thing...i mean, the schedule doesnt really mean anything. its all just a waste of time, effort, and natural resources. I think i get a new schedule everyday, but the schedule is made out for a week, sometimes two, and i have never seen the end of one schedule. the new one comes out the next day and leaves me sitting there wondering why it was changed. its all kinda pointless.
anyway, things out here are pretty much the same. i have been sweating it out on the day shift again, and things couldnt be hotter. I think that the mornings are staying cool, but the afternoons are so friggin hot that i have to keep moving from shadow to shadow to avoid melting. Death by powerpoint is getting in to full swing, and i dont know what Bill Gates was thinking when he gifted the world with that cursed piece of software. I dont think that the Army is capable of doing anything, anymore, without having a powerpoint presentation to explain how to do it. I have seen powerpoints on how to flush a toilet, how to use a skillcraft pen, how to get a Humvee airborne, and how to punish soldiers who get Humvees airborne. Need to get something from supply? Here, watch this powerpoint. aaaaggghhhh! I am losing my mind slowly but surely. i need to get out of the army before they sucessfully reprogram me.
soon.

I am very much looking forward to enjoying fall in the southern united states. it will be the first time that i will have been able to enjoy watching the leaves change in VA, i think that i will also go up and see the district, besides i need a passport anyway-might as well kill two birds with one stone. all for now
Andrew

plenty of time to sleep when you're dead...

2007-08-21T00:45:00.000-04:00

I love this time of year...especially being on the graveyard right now...who needs sleep? appearently not me. i have surveys to fill out about my health during the deployment, room inspections to take part in, and a whole smorgisbord of usless activities to participate in with all the 9-5 crowd-not like i just finished a shift or anything...I LOVE MY JOB!!!!!!
cant wait to see American soil again....

living the dream...

2007-08-20T00:39:00.000-04:00

i just started working the graveyard shift, and i never fully appreciated the toil that it puts on the human body. i think that i am more tired right now than i have been in quite some time. unfortunately, the sun is up and my body is awake, so here i am writing to you.
sorry it has been so long since i posted. things have been a little busy here at work, and we have had a few bad days. it amazes me that despite the emotional drain of a bad day at work, i am still able to wake up and do it all again. i try to get excited about the little things more often. like today for example, we are already planning-16 hours before shift begins-to get really excited about reviewing the 50 cal clearing procedures. like stupid excited. its the little things that really make the day go by.
just had breakfast at the dining facility for the first time in almost 3 months. the rest of the time i have a to-go plate delivered to my workplace...ah the luxury. of course, nothing in the plate is really edible by the time that the plate arrives, because it took an hour to drive the food from the DFAC (dining facility) to the ECP. thank you to whatever Colonel decided to reduce the speed limit even lower. 25 mph is a little rediculous, but 10mph is an all new low.
moving day is approaching and i find myself learning to live a little more like LJ. If i am not going to use it in the next 3 months, throw it away. however, there was just some stuff that i could not live without. 160 dollars in postage to mail it all back.
nough for now
AJ

Golden Slumbers...

2007-07-14T03:08:00.000-04:00

sometimes i wish that i was peter pan. i wish that i had never grown up to find that the world was such a mess. i really miss that one thing from my childhood, naivety. i really would rather not have ever seen the third world, but now the images of starving children are forever engrained in my mind. it shouldn't be that way.

once there was a way to get back homeward,
once there was a way to get back home...
sleep pretty darling, do not cry, and i will sing a lullaby.
golden slumbers fill your eye,
smile I'll wake you when you rise.
sleep pretty darling, do not cry, and i'll will sing a lullaby.
once there was a way to get back homeward.
once there was a way to get back home.
sleep pretty darling, do not cry, and i will sing a lullaby.

Don't tread on me...

2007-07-04T07:41:00.000-04:00

As we celebrate as a nation, our independance, we are offered a moment to reflect on our past, our present, and the direction of our future. I think then, that it is appropriate to consider our past and the images that have formed our perception of national pride. I

think that although it was never officially adopted as a national flag, the Culpepper flag is demonstrative of the colonists attitude at the inception of our nation. a rattlesnake coiled and ready to strike is a very appropriate image to communicate the righteous anger of the colonist on their violated human rights. they had rights as Englishmen that were violated in such a way that the colonists challanged the greatest military, the largest empire, and the king himself in such a way that the world still has not recovered from the shock wave that it generated.

We hold these truths to be self-evident.

it is not surprising that an untrained Army mounted a campaign against their parent nation. a group of farmer colonists rose up against a monarchy that had oppressed them from 3000 miles away, but what is surprising is that they won.

That all men are created equal.

we have endured many struggles to establish freedom for all men, but have only recently been able to rise above the challenges presented by racial, ethnic, and religious bias.

That they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights.

it is by no product of american ingenuity, or economic prowess that we have the rights and freedoms provided by our constitution. these rights are part of a natural law written by our creator, and not subject to interpretation and limitation imposed by the law of man.

that, among these, are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Our rights are not limited to those that are listed, but we have rights beyond what is covered. we have a right to enjoy life, exist with liberty, and pursue our happiness in whatever form that may take.

our rights cannot be abridged, cannot be denied, and must be defended. just like colonial america, we stand ready to pursue, engage, and destroy the enemies of freedom, justice, and equality wherever they may present themselves. crouched like a rattlesnake in the bushes, we are prepared to administer justice on this global platform.

Although, we as Americans come preprogrammed with the justice of our forming documents in the very material of our construction, i think that it is occationally necessary for us to remind ourselves of what it is we stand for, what it is that we believe, and what it is that we fight for...

"We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America."

I, Andrew John Haberer, do solemnly swear that i will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foriegn and domestic; that i will bear true faith and allegience to the same; and that i will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.

one.org

2007-07-02T05:59:00.000-04:00

I just got around to reading about the one campaign, and i think that it is a worthy objective and have attached my name to the list. i would like to see my legislators take action to end extreme global poverty and disease, and we have the ability, more so now than ever before. I would encourage you to log on to the one.org website and see if it is something that you would like to see accomplished in your life time. the time is now. ACT.

www.one.org

the love of first world ammenities...

2007-06-30T23:17:00.000-04:00

I got up really early this morning. some friends stopped by and woke me up for breakfast. its been a long time since i was up this early. and it has been a long time since i was away from work to eat breakfast.
i am really tired, but thought that since i was up, i would put down a post. things here are as crazy as ever. the showers are back on, but who knows how long that will last...we take pleasure in the simple things in life out here, like running water.
thats all for now...ill put some more up later...
andrew

the pain of technology gaps

2007-06-28T15:28:00.000-04:00

i just want everyone to know that i have tried to log on to post several times in the past week, and this is the first time that i have logged in successfully. I am trying to post more often, but keep in mind that i live in a third world country and we are in the 120 degree range right now. I have been cutting out a lot of sleep lately to avoid moving around outside of my CHU during anytime that the sun is up. unfortunately i work during the day so that is putting a cramp in my style. the "state of the art" body armor is once again a large george foreman grill and i find that spending more than five minutes in indirect sunlight is getting unbearable. we still arent to the hottest days of the summer. water conservation has reached a peak, and the showers have been shut off for 3 days now. let me tell you about that. first of all, i work around people that smell like they havent showered since bible times, but, then, to have myself and co-workers join in on the whole chirade, its almost more than my worn phyche can handle.
i am wholly exhausted. this is my least favorite time of the deployment. it never changes, and never fails. i am so tired that it hurts. sometimes i try to sleep, but no matter how long i sleep i still wake up tired. i wonder to myself what we are doing here, sometimes its clear, other times it is shrouded in the haze that blankets this country. indisciminate options rise from the desert floor and then shimmer and fade like the heat baking this war to an unfavorable end. I wish that i could look into the future and see if the work we are putting in here will eventually pay off, or if it is just futile investment in an unstable and shaky future.
i love you all and hope that somehow i find the motivation to keep going in this heat. Dad, i still have a bunch of otter-pops, and those really help give me a momentary burst of motivation...make me feel like a kid again.

andrew

the harsh reality of war...

2007-06-06T02:28:00.000-04:00

I thought that going to funerals was the hard part of war, but i had an experience this week that made me question this war. I was at a formation on the airfield to load caskets on a plane, and when the flag drapped caskets passed, i found myself wondering what we were doing here. it is always hard when it hits home. I was really depressed about the whole ordeal, but my friend lewis put it into perspective for me.
she told me about the first time that she had to load bodies for the trip home. she knew the soldiers who died, and was standing in the formation. she saw the bodies pass her and began to question the war. but then she looked left, and right. she saw strangers all around her. strangers that had become her family. people that live and die for each other. not politcians, preachers, or family. but for one another. Two heros started their trip home. I found a family in the process.

how do you tell someone they dont know how to do their job?

2007-05-15T09:00:00.000-04:00

another long week. trouble on the home front. I got an email from one of my friends back at ft lee. she rescued my promotion packet from the shedder pile, found my award from pakistan, and in three days completed a tasked that my personnel NCO could not complete in 8 months. frustration. i love you, miss you, and cannot wait to see you. maybe the lake will work out, no word yet. ill call you later.

Will the war in Iraq be successful?

2007-04-30T09:22:00.000-04:00

Many people are now asking if the war in iraq is going to be a success, and if not when should we cut our losses and move on. I do not profess to know the answer to that question, nor the patience to continue answering the question. I will, therefore, let someone else answer for me.
we have an interpreter that works on our installation that left iraq about ten years ago. he has been living in detroit since then, and he has been working for the US army here in iraq for about 2 years. He came to work in this country, despite living comfortably in america, because he believes in the freedom of the Iraqi people. it is his desire, as is the desire of many toiling on a daily basis here in this country, to see this war be successful. even amidst the violence of late, he is convinced that it is working.
The american people have been betrayed by the press since the beginning of the war. The American and International press outlets are only concerned with ratings and have sacrificed the true story of iraq to the neilson families across america. The press never tells about the public works projects like the water project in Jedallah, that has put pure water in the tap for the first time in history of this tribe. the press never tells about the power project at the Haiditha dam, they never tell about the rail project that is bringing the iraq railroad back on line for the first time in half a century, and they surely never speak of the phenomenal success of the Oil Protection Institute in protecting the oil assets of this country.
For your own sake, and that of the citizens of this country, write your congressman and tell them that we need two more years to teach the people of this country how to life free, and whatever you do, do not watch the news, they are only lying to you.

I think i am tired...not like road kill, but tired.

2007-03-28T04:00:00.000-04:00

i had a day off the other day and slept for almost 22hrs. it seems to me that the first six months is the easy part, but now the days are dragging. i am involved in a lot of projects to keep me busy, but this makes me more tired. i just cannot wait to be back in the states. i am tired of being out of the country. i like being an American, and everything that comes with it. i miss being home.

the eyes are the window to the soul...

2007-03-13T08:13:00.000-04:00

sometimes i look into the eyes of the local nationals that come into the FOB, and sometimes i feel as though I am looking into the windows of their souls. sometimes inside i see true horrors looking back at me, and other times i see dreams unfulfilled. a while ago i was providing medical treatment to an injured local. part of me was trying to stay detatched due to the severity of the wound, and the other part of me was curious about the person that i was treating. I was very impressed by the mechanical attention that the other Specialist, that was working with me, was paying to me.
This was not my first time treating a severe injury, and, as a result, i was calm and effective in my actions. the thing that amazes me about a soldier is that they will feed upon the strongest person in the situation. if there is someone in panic, they will panic. if someone is calm, cool, and collected, they will be the same.
the local was in pain, but that was not his fear. it was the first time that he had been shot at, and you could feel the fear in his voice. he was petrified. my iterpretor was thorough, a rock in a storm, a liason between two soldiers unable to communicate.
The one thing that i have learned from injuries i have recieved, is that seeing it makes it worse. just trying to protect the eyes makes treating the victim that much easier.

I see pain in my interpretors eyes. not the kind of pain that results from an injury, but more from the pain caused by fear of the unknown. sometimes he confides his fears in me, and i try my best to reassure him that we will not abandon this experiment. I dont know much, but i know that this will work. we just need time. time to foster the growth of a nation that will be a shining example to the arab world, and one that will not be a puppet of the american government but will be a government of the people, for the people, and by the people.

there is little trust in this part of the world. years of tyranny have tainted the people. America was there once, and we have moved on to become the beacon of freedom. I just hope that the fears of the american people will not prevent us from completing the good that we have started here in this little corner of the world.

pray for peace, pray for victory, pray for wisdom in the leadership of this country and our own.

Death to the IPOD!

2007-03-10T08:22:00.000-05:00

I have recently joined the revolution to abandon the Ipod's domination of the MP3 player market. I am now the proud owner of a Zune. and i love it. many of the features are a lot of fun and convenient.
Another day goes by and here i am sitting on the internet writing to home, wondering who reads this, and wondering why i write...
I am sick of this country, i am sick of this war, and most of all i am sick of the US press covering it. the lies told in the press amaze me. where is the acountability? what happened to the jounalists telling the story, and when did all news become op-ed?
things continue as normal here. the workers come, the workers work, the workers leave. and i am still here

The Daily grind...

2007-03-07T13:31:00.000-05:00

Bob-I just want to give you a special shout out to thank you for the Starbucks mug and the starbucks coffee. the kenya blend may just be my new favorite. I have thoroughly delved into the depths of the coffee bag and do not have much remaining, but it was well worth the binge into the "good" side of coffee verses the "army" side of coffee. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. (P.S. I think you have made me a target amongst my peers, they all eyeball the coffee mug with great interest....look but dont touch-thats my philosophy.)
MO I am staying put for the time being, there are no interesting missions for me to take, so i have begun to occupy my time by remodeling the office. I have started painting the walls and ordering new furniture to be made by the locals working on the FOB. Things are starting to look a little more "High Class" than they were before, and i am no longer embarassed to entertain the brass as they often come and check on our operations.
I, along with my co-workers, continue to refine the systems that we have in place to make them more efficient and effective and things are running smoother than ever before. I miss you and i pray for you everyday. Write me an email and let me know how everything went in LA.

I love and miss you all-
Patricia thank you for the pictures of Cody-
Leah thank you for the pictures of Noah and the package-i dominated the nutter butters with great vengance and furious anger-
MO the flag is in the mail-please let chris know that Nichole's class can expect their's soon as well-better yet keep it a secret.
Nicole, i have one on the way to your class as well...so keep your eyes peeled for it.

From Iraq with love-
Andrew

2007-02-28T10:57:00.000-05:00

My Grandfather passed away earlier this week, please pray that God would be there for the comfort needs of our family.

Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night

2007-02-26T04:23:00.000-05:00

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on that sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Dylan Thomas

yet another day ticks by...

2007-02-24T02:41:00.000-05:00

I dont know how much longer i can stand being on this one day cycle. everyday is monday, groundhogs day...I am just looking for a little adventure to fall into my lap and maybe provide a little excitement.
Things here are pretty much the same. miss you all
Andrew

The IQ test...

2007-02-22T04:43:00.000-05:00

You know what i learned about the IQ test...The us military started testing iq for entrance exams during WWII. I took another iq test to check the results on the last one i did earlier this year, and i found that the results were the exact same. I have a 135 IQ confirmed by two different mensa approved tests. I thought that it was cool, and thought that i would share it with all of you.
Kinda busy round here, dont be suprised if i dont post for a while.
Andrew

When i find myself in Times of Trouble.

2007-02-16T11:57:00.000-05:00

Five miles outside of vegas when we broke down,
threw my keys inside the window and we never looked back.
Got all drunk and sloppy on a Greyhound bus,
we passed out all them loosers they were laughing at us.
I will never let them break your heart.
No i will never let them break me.
we got lost in phoenix seemed like such a long time,
seven months of living sweaty on those thin white lines.
did some time for selling acid to the wrong guy.
life just keeps on getting smaller and we never as why,
why there is no perfect place yes i know this is true,
im just learning how to smile and thats not easy to do.
i know there will come a day when we can leave and just go running away
we was broke outside of LA when the storms came.
i was working in New Jersey had to run in the rain,
we was happy talking dirty at that phone sex place.
life just keeps on getting better for us everyday.
you say there is no perfect place,
i say i know this is true.
we're just learning how to smile, and thats not easy to do
we both live for the day when we can run away
oh baby we can run away.
we can leave it all behind like we do everytime.
we both live for the day when we can run away.
no i will never let them break your heart.
no i will never let it break me.
five miles outside of vegas five years down the line.
we got married in the desert in the sunshine.
i can handle all the hell it happens everyday,
when you smile and touch my face
you make it all just go away.
yes i know there is no bigger pond,
i know theres never air.
we are just learning how to fall and climb back up again.
i know there's nothing perfect, i know there's nothing to loose
we are just learning how to live together me and you.
you know i live for the day when we you say baby lets just run away.
yes we can leave this place and run away.

its been a tough couple of weeks. Sometimes i feel myself being antisocial and finding solace in my ipod. its amazing to me how much of an impact music is in the life of humans. Music is affected by the social atmosphere, and the social atmosphere is affected by music. a symbiotic relationship that is so important. I know that my posts have seemed a little dark lately, but i have been hurting emotionally lately. I m just learning how to fall and climb back up again. It is difficult to loose a friend. its strange how it impacts you in so many different ways.
somtimes i sit back and i really wonder "what are we doing here?"
It always makes me think of a story from my first tour in iraq. We had been working a tough week in August. The Brigade commander had driven up to the Balad bridge for some reason, and he decided that the Hesco Bastions that were emplaced for force protection purposes were not pretty enough and wanted them replaced with concrete barriers. This meant that Support Platoon would have the wonderful task of doing the actual work. 18 hour days in 140 degree weather is not pretty. on the third day of barrier emplacement, we had been out for 14 hours in full battle rattle, sweating our asses off, when i lost it. I couldnt do it any more. I sat down on a jersey barrier to take a little break and drink some hot water (i had no other options).
There is something universal about the spirit of a child. they will do anything to make a few dollars, and usually this means a lemonade stand. At the Balad Bridge there was a small "haji" mart, a lemonade stand of sorts. The little kids at the bridge would sell dvds, sodas, and other small trinkets to passing convoys all day long. for the whole week that we were working at the bridge, these kids were trying to sell stuff to us all day. Well, this particular day i was fed up. the heat had gotten to me, the work had gotten to me, and I was just overwhelmed.
I sat down on the barrier and was taking a break. one of the kids just sat down next to me, and I expected to have him ask me for money or try to sell me some piece of crap made in china. I was about to tell him to buzz off, when he said, "thank you." I was stunned into silence. Thank god i was unable to speak, because it gave this young man a chance to continue speaking. "Thank you for coming here and removing Sadaam Hussein. My whole family loves America. My village loves Americans. Sadaam Hussein was a Bad man. Now that he is gone my family has hope for a better life." This hit me like a train wreck. Here i was just about to tell this kid to beat it, and He was an angel that just communicated a message to me from God. Stay the course. Finish what you have started. When I was ready to quit, when i had lost all hope, when I was down in the dumps, this kid reached out and communicated a message of hope for me. Every time i think about that story, it gives me the energy to finish what i have started. That day at the bridge every sacrifice that i, and my comrades in arms, had made was worth the blood, sweat, toil, and tears. We made a difference in that one child's life.

As The debate over this war continues, Just keep in mind that we made a difference. Regardless of what is being said on the television, in the halls of congress, and in the fierce protests against this war-Know that we made a difference in one child's life, and we gave his entire family the hope for a brighter future.

The wonderful beauty of balance.

2007-02-13T00:12:00.000-05:00

I think that its kind of funny that we live in a world today where there is a pill for everything. Sad? Here have some happy pills! Angry? theres a pill for that, too! and need i mention Bob Dole???
We have stopped asking questions and just started throwing chemicals at the problem hoping to find an answer. When to we hit the point where there will not be a solution to the ever growing problem in america. we do not take time out of our incredibly busy lives to take interest in another human being. the nuclear family melted down somewhere in the sixties, and since then divorce is more common than marriage, depression is at an all time high, interest in other people is in the tank, and we wonder what is wrong with america.
When was the last time you did something for your neighbor? Who was the last person you gave a helping hand to? How can you better your own community?
these are the questions we need to ask ourselves, but they are not the ones we are asking. the more common questions involve a nice tall fence between us and our neighbor, the war on terror, and whether or not you have liquids in your carryons. What happened to america?
When will we get the picture, and will it be too late?
Andrew

The little engine that could...

2007-02-10T14:01:00.000-05:00

sometimes a children's story is all that you really need to find direction in your adult life. No matter what was happening around that little engine, he just kept trucking on down the tracks. Sometimes you just have to picture the finishline, no matter how far away it is, and set your focus on the pomp and circumstance that surrounds the finish and let that be the driving force.
SMSGT Duncan told me that i would never amount to anything-whether he said that with sincerity, or said it to be the catylist for change, it challenged me. Tell me i can't do something and i will find every possible way to get that something done.
Today i recieved a coin from a full bird COL. He said that initiative, dedication, and performance were attributes that he looks for in every soldier. If the army was full of soldiers like me the world would be a better place. The little engine that could.
To the naysayers in my midst, I say Can and Will!

NMMI look at me now!

though sad...I am still trucking on down the tracks...
andrew

When good news doesnt arrive...

2007-02-08T11:52:00.000-05:00

have you ever had one of those weeks where it seems like the good news will never come? that has been my week...we had a memorial service at the beginning of the week, and i spoke...it was extremely difficult to try and do such for someone at such a young age. The good die young? all i know is I do not want to attend another funeral in my life. i hurts too much. ive been very quiet lately. nothing to say really. I have lost interest in a lot of activities. I started taking my medication again and started journaling. writing down the stuff that i cant put here. the stuff that scares even me. i miss being home.
sometimes i wish that i never joined the army. it would have saved me a lot of heartache. now i find myself in a position where i would rather volunteer to put myself in those gruesome situations to protect someone else from losing their innosence. I am already messed up, why should someone else suffer, when i already do.
ILY IMY
Andrew

You are now entering the Tail Spin Zone!!

2007-01-28T03:15:00.000-05:00

we are currently restructuring in my office, and as a result, i am working fewer hours. what a deal. usually the boss is always looking for more ways to get a few more hours out of you, but in this case, the boss is trying to send me home early-Nice!!
I have heard the latest report from my mother-my nephews are doing great, cody is gaining weight and looking downright pudgy. Noah is exploring more and more-leah please send more pictures...
things are busy and uncertain here in iraq-we are all trying to complete our mission-all we need now is the cooperation of a congress seeking to prove itself. politics are a part of daily life out here, and yet they seem so distant. Washington has never seemed so far away.
Anyway-i have to go get ready to go to work and fight the good fight.
Andrew

I'm an Infantryman trapped in a Fueler's body...

2007-01-24T07:57:00.000-05:00

Sorry its been so long, i have been having some difficulty accessing this site. its strange to me sometimes when i sit back and realize that i am still in the third world.

a lot of stress lately. i am finally back to normal hours. i dont think that i should have taken R&R so early in the rotation. now i have nothing to look forward to. watched a few movies today. i was really irritated by a movie about iraq. sometimes its the small details that really get to me. like how the soldiers were wearing their uniforms, the names of cities mispronounced, the way that they talked about war.

I dont think ill ever be able to forget the first time that i saw a dead body, or the first time that i smelled burning flesh, or the first time that i heard incoming fire, but i do know that i dont want someone to pretend that they know the emotions that are attached to such events. I always used to watch war movies and think that it was cool. Sometimes i wish that i could go back to january 2003 and talk myself out of joining the army, and then other times i think that i should reenlist-sometimes it seems like there is no other job out there that i want to do.

theres been a knot in my stomach for about 2 weeks now. this is how i always felt before something bad happened, but i know that my senses arent as keen as they were the last time i was out here. i need to get back out on the road. that is where i belong, not trapped here on the FOB turning into a pog and looking and sounding more like a fobbit as the days pass.

andrew

sometimes the weekend never comes.

2007-01-18T08:16:00.000-05:00

so, have you ever had co-workers complain so much that your boss took away your weekends? just let me tell you how horrible it is to have that happen. I am now working about 80 hour weeks, so if my posts are a little sparce it is because i am exhausted.

the good news is that-well i dont really think that i have any good news.

i do have news, but not good new. speaking of news, i was watching Lou Dobbs on CNN-i know, but i have no other options-and it was so plainly obvious that CNN has gone to the far left, i dont know if they will ever be able to pull out of their dive into liberal bias. ever. He was blatantly criticizing President Bush, in many cases for things that he doesnt even control, and was trying to get the people that were on his show to change their opinions to mirror his-clearly goading them into his liberal cesspool. Unbelievable.

foxnews upsets me lately too. ok we get it. fair and balanced-do you have to tell us ever time you speak????

at least bill o'reily can still be depended on, but i never get to watch because i am at work.

ill keep you posted.

andrew

2007-01-09T03:47:00.000-05:00

The more things change the more they stay the same. Job stress is at an all time high-for no reason. lots of in-fighting, complaining, and lack of communication. it is really stressing me out, and starting to affect my sleep patterns. I am not sleeping through the night and usually wake up 2 or 3 times. this job is not that difficult, why do we need to find things to stress over?

otherwise things are well-still no mail...but the connex should arrive soon. I look forward to recieving my package MO.

ILYIMYSWAK
Andrew

The School of Rock...

2007-01-06T04:02:00.000-05:00

I think that rock is...predictable. I think that unlike any other form of communication, the ability of rock to react to stimulus and produce the desired result of "sticking it to the man" is unmatched in a world so unbelievably connected. When the "man" reaches a point where the world of rock can no longer tolerate his infringment on their daily life, they respond in suit with music designed to "bring it all down."
Take Green day for example. Self-proclaimed bush haters. Social and political liberals to the core. Individuals? or pre-programed robots of a liberal media?
Green Day was involved in the 924 gillman st punk project until the day they sold out to a major label-sold out or bought in? its a question many fans have asked since Dookie, and one that has renewed its intensity since the huge success of American Idiot. The question that i ask was when did they sell out to political parties and partisan politics? I think that I will eventually find my answer, but until that point i will continue to ponder-I hope you will join me on this adventure.
a small bit of lyrics from the title track of their album American Idiot-
Dont want to be an american idiot,
one nation controlled by the media.
information age of hysteria-
is calling out to idiot america.

controlled by the media? who's controlled by the media? I dont recall Green Day ever making a trip to iraq, but they are sure taking the time to engage in political mud slinging contests against the current administration based on information that they have not collected themselves-information they have gathered from the media. i guess the question that i really have is does it make you an "american idiot", in this "information age of hysteria", to allow yourself to be "controlled by the media" and not formulate your own opinions based on fact instead of assumtions?

I will let you know the details of what is going on with me when i have more time.
Andrew

Boots on the Ground: a soldiers story of Iraq (part 6)

2007-01-04T00:12:00.000-05:00

I guess the trip down to An Najaf was when I really fell in love with the army. That trip was when Basic Training ended, and it was when my life became a war movie. "Haji" was in the bushes, helocopters were running constant sorties into the city, and we were building a new camp. FOB Duke may not have been more than a patch of sand at the time, but it was home. I was a PFC (Private First Class-dont forget that there were two rank levels below me now), and I was in charge of all the Class I supplies for the entire company. 150 soldiers depended on me to have water and chow available at every meal, and the company first seargeant was depending on me to maintain a three day supply.
This was a lot of responsibility for a private, but i was first class at it. I was making deals, bartering fuel, and, on some occasions, stealing when necessary, but we never ran out of food or water. I had enough of a stockpile at one point that soldiers were getting 2 MRE's(the army calls them Meals Ready to Eat, but soldiers fondly refer to them as Meals Rejected by Etheopians). This becomes very important after eating MRE's for two or more weeks because the meals, as arranged, become boring. allowing each soldier 2 MRE's, allows the soldier to pick and choose what they want to eat, and, in some cases, build their own meal using what was supplied. This increases the morale of soldiers who are already fed up with the army, and increases in overall mission accomplishment.
The typical day in An Najaf was almost always the same. The sun would wake me up-we did not like sleeping in the tents, too hot and stuffy-and i would slowly climb out of my hammock. I had "Built" quite the living space between two of our trucks, and with the tarp over the top i had an excellent living space. We never wore our body armor, there was no need that prompted such measures. in fact, we never really wore the tops to our uniforms. just a brown t-shirt and sunglasses. I liked that a lot. After i got out of bed and put my pants on, i would walk over to the mechanics trailer and get a cup of coffee. we were only allowed to get coffee after first sergeant got his first cup, and there was only enough for each of us to get one cup. but if you needed more, there was always coffee crystals in the MRE that you ate for breakfast. Nothing like a boneless porkchop, chunked and formed, for breakfast. I usually had a bean and rice burrito for lunch, but that would make for a rough afternoon. You see-when you dont even have laundry service, that means that you dont really have bathrooms either. our "Toilet" was a 2 foot by 4 foot trench that was 4 feet deep. Not exactly luxury, but who really cares. when you can literally scrape the dirt off of any part of your body, it doesnt really matter that you are sitting on a tank road wheel, taking a crap in a trench, and not looking forward to a shower at night, or anytime in the near future. eventually you just let go.
It seemed like the political battle was the war we were really fighting in Najaf. You see, we were sent down to An Najaf with the orders that we were going to destroy the city-something along the lines of the Roman Army vs. Jeruselem. This was the image always conjured in my mind. I would be in Downtown An Najaf, refueling and rearming an Abrams tank, while death and destruction was raining down all around me. this was not quite the case. instead we mostly played spades. not joking. from the time we finished breakfast until the time the sun went down, we played spades. In Fact, I played the hell out of spades. my partner and I were untouchable. people came into our house and thought they could play. They were sent back to their tank with an MRE and the shame of defeat. I love my job.
the downside of Najaf was the fact that there was an army-well a malitia, supporters of Muqtada al Sadr, that wanted us dead. we had more than one run-in with these SOB's. My TC, Sgt Long, almost died one night in a traffic circle. their tank was hit with 6 RPG's(rocket propelled grenades) in rapid succession. the fuel can in the bustle rack caught on fire and spilled down into the engine. the tank commander did not want to extinguish the fire for fear that the engine would not restart, and made a decision to drive balls to the wall trying to put the fire out. the RPG's did not stop coming, and small arms fire joined in. a mission that was started as a raid, turned, rapidly, into a mission to save a tank. Just so you know, an Abrams tank is so fast it can out run fire. 22 or more rpgs hit the tank, and the crew lived to tell the tale. the tank was badly damaged, and the maintenance team quickly recovered, repaired, and returned the tank to the battle. I love my job. i would gladly give my life for the men that I served with in Najaf. They are my hero's.
Col. Dana J. H. Pittard, commander of the 3rd BDE, 1st Infantry Division, had been working with the local national government, the President of the United States, and Muqtada Al Sadr-a rouge terrorist who, i believe to this day, should have been killed in that battle for the hundreds of marines killed at his commands. a truce was reached after Sadr's hideout was hit with a deadly barage of artillery, and he suddenly changed his mind about the war for Najaf. It was a great day as we prepared to leave the camp we built. the Alabama national guard arrived the day we left. they brought showers, phones, laundry, and a world class dining facility with them. Man i love my job.
We pulled out of the gate of FOB Duke and headed for Highway one-Northbound, back to FOB Scunion where my bed, showers, and real toilet waited for me. 45 days of hell-45 days of filth-45 days that I will cherish for the rest of my life.

i love my job.

Work Sucks, i think ill retire early-

2007-01-02T07:47:00.000-05:00

I just thought that it was a waste of my better years in life to be trapped in a job, and i dont think that i am really using my time as good as i could if i were retired.
I hereby tender my resignation, pending approval by the pentagon, which could take years-you know how the military is with paperwork-and effective, upon approval of my resignation, i will assume duties sipping margarita's and other cocktails out of coconut halves on some warm sandy beach in some foreign country in the south pacific, or gulf region, until i reach an age where i feel like i am too old to sit on a beach. at which point i will then get a job.

sincerely
andrew

Things are more of the same...

2007-01-01T03:20:00.000-05:00

yeah-thats not photoshoped! thats the real deal...
miss you already.
andrew

it is good to be back here in iraq. I missed the stress, and the friends that i have out here. the execution of sadam went largely unnoticed. no suprise there. life as usual. we are eager for the coming new year and another year of work towards peace. my mother just sent me this picture of me in pakistan meeting Pres. Bush. just thought i would share it with you.

The never ending flight...

2006-12-27T17:23:00.000-05:00

the flight here is now over...i have arrived safely, although i was trapped in the center section of the plane the whole flight. i was still on an aisle seat but the fact of the matter remains, my size requires an exit row. international flights are not fun. at least not in coach. i will call you as soon as i get back to the base mom.

Army Strong

2006-12-25T21:23:00.001-05:00


There's strong, and then there's US Army Strong. Do you have what it takes?

Stuck in Dallas

2006-12-25T16:02:00.000-05:00

somehow it always seems that the breaks always come at precisely the wrong moment. I was praying for a delay in kuwait so that i would be able to be home on christmas day, but no delay. I prayed for snow to close the airport, and it did...three days early. I got to dallas, and i was hoping for a quick flight out of here, and what happens...delay. Clearly i am not capable of getting the good stuff.
Anyways-I am taking the time to finally get some sleep. Noah and Cody have seriously interrupted my sleep schedule. Noah likes to get up at 0430 Colorado time, and as i was a good uncle, i had to get up and play with him (actually, i could not resist-he is too cute to not hang out with). Cody on the other hand is a lot more low maintenence. he eats, poops, and sleeps (there is a lot of work that has to be done just for these three activities, but love's labor is worth it in the end). My time spent in CO was well worth it. I met Joanna (leah's Au Pair). She was charming and easy to entertain-I hope that i was not too boring :)
Activities around the Haberer house are never boring. we had plenty of projects to complete (walls to paint, cabinets to build, rooms to babyproof, etc...) in the beginning of my leave, and then we had so much going on that i am truly worn out. I think that i will be glad to get to Iraq so that i can finally get some sleep ;)
thats all for now. I will write more later.
Andrew

who needs to dream of a white christmas...

2006-12-21T19:24:00.000-05:00

Well, today is the first day after the Storm and I was outside all day digging a path to the main road. as you can see from the collection of snow next to the driveway, there was considerable snowfall overnight. the total snowfall from the center of the Cul de Sac was 22 inches. What a treat this was-just think a week ago i was in iraq!! My back and arms are really sore from the workout recieved by moving all the snow. there is a lot of snow. patricia reported 6 foot drifts in her back yard...leah is almost here-she was one of the many cancelled flights coming into denver-she opted to rent a car, and she is now on here way.

I am dreading the return to iraq, and up until this storm i have really not had a chance to put it from my mind. maybe there will be more storms-for like 6-9 months...guess not. well, whether the weather cooperates or not, i will continue to keep you posted on the goings on. i think that i have enough inspiration now to write the next installment to my story, part six right?

anywho-much love from the snow burried colorado. althogh entrenched in the drifts i still think about all of you-

Andrew

the trouble with shift work...

2006-12-04T01:36:00.000-05:00

I am really excited to come home. I kind of feel like i am in a rut...have you ever seen the movie with Bill Murray in it-Ground hogs day? Everyday i wake up and it is the same as the day before. no new stories, no new activities, its just the same. I thought life as a soldier was supposed to be exciting...oh well.
ill write more later...
andrew

the CDC is right-vaccinate early!

2006-11-28T04:21:00.000-05:00

Thanks for the comments, i am working on the next installment but have been really busy. things here in Iraq are rather normal-as normal as this country can be...I am really excited for the trip home, the new pictures of my nephews make me a little homesick in a good way. I cannot wait to have the opportunity to hold them and play with them. Flu shots stink. I am suprised that i did not get sick this year. I guess that my body is already fighting enough disease that it is ready for whatever comes its way. Go Immune System!!
I miss you all-
I will try to get some more work done on the next installment.
Andrew

Boots on the Ground: a Soldiers story of the War In Iraq

2006-11-26T09:01:00.000-05:00

We were staged at FOB Warhorse waiting from the word from higher command as to when we would be departing. I knew that it would be an early morning, and that it would be at the most inconvenient time for me-thats just the way the army works. I took my time to pray and think through my actions before we departed to one of the worst areas of iraq. I knew that things were going to be different on this operation than anything i had been through so far. i took time to clean my M16 thoroughly, I knew that i was going to need it. every time that something bad happened to me, i would have a gut feeling that something was wrong before it happened. ever since i had arrived in Iraq, this sense was stronger than ever. I knew that something was going to go horribly wrong. we got word that we were going to leave in the early morning, just before sunrise. the chaplain came over from FOB Scunion and prayed with us. we prayed for safe travel and return, we prayed that God's hand would work through us in this mission, and I prayed that i would feel his presense. I had seen enough action already (i.e. the usual improvised explosive device), that i was ready for this convoy, but nothing could have prepared me for the journey ahead.
We rolled out of the north gate of FOB Warhorse just after sunrise and began the long journey south to An Najaf. We had to go out of the way of most of the cities along the quick route because unfriendly personnel were prepared for our march south. Thank you CNN. Our operation had been headline news for days. Have you ever felt like complete strangers knew more about what you were doing than you did? I was just a private. they tell me to drive, i do it. they tell me to shoot, i do it. Why do i need to know any more than that? My vehicle commander was a combat veteran. he had been a member of a tank crew, and he had seen enough action already. he knew what to do. SGT Long would be manning the only 50 caliber weapon among the support vehicles. support had sent 2 cargo HEMTT's and 2 Fuel HEMTT's. i was driving one of the cargo HEMTT's with a battle load of tank rounds and enough food and water for three days. i would have rather been on a rolling bomb than what i was carrying-hello private, i have no say in what happens to me. The ride was mostly uneventful for the first 12 hours...did i tell you that it was only supposed to take 12 hours. we were in the middle of a hostile area, and our commander was lost. thank you West Point. we had been lost for about 4 hours, switch-backed across lord only knows how many miles of iraq, and we were still no closer to An Najaf. the convoy commander had led us down the wrong road not once, not 3 times, but 4 times. did the lead vehicle have a team of monkeys working around the clock to make sure that we never got there or what?
Things progressively went downhill. by midnight, we were lost in Downtown Al Hillah. A little history lesson on Al Hillah. This city was an insurgent stronghold since the outset of the war. the people of the city had not seen an american in months. Al Hillah had been blacklisted and american troops were not to enter the city. here we are downtown in a city, at night, and we were lost. great. I saw hate in the eyes of the people on the street. if you looked long enough into their eyes, you could just picture that same individual holding a handsaw and cutting your head of for the nightly news. my gut was doing summersaults. i was going to die, and my mother was going to have to learn from CNN. I dont think i have ever felt such a suffocating feeling as i did looking into the eyes of these people on the streets of this unfriendly neighborhood. where was mr rogers when you needed him? we made it through downtown without incident, and I began to relax as we reached the outskirts of town. that's when i saw it. a white phosphorus parachute flare. this put both my TC (truck commander) and myself back on edge. we continued to drive down the road and made a left turn. there was a canal on the left side of the road and dense shubs on the right side of the road. this was not a good development. then i saw it again, another flare. we passed a marine convoy going the other direction, and that put my mind at ease. they were the ones who fired off the flares, i knew it. we made it about a mile down the road and that is when all hell broke loose. I saw the third and final flare.

boom

The Heavy Equipment Transport (HET) 4 vehicles in front of mine was hit. time stood still. you know how in the movies, when the battle starts, everything goes into slow motion? they arent bullshiting. it felt like an eternity we were sitting there staring at the site of the explosion and wondering why the HET wouldnt move. then we started to see movement all around us. people were pouring out of a house just to the right of the site of the explosion. the track vehicles on the trailer of the HET started to fire on the people running up towards us. SGT Long fired off a string of expletives and then matched fire with his 50 cal. I was in a dream. this couldnt be happening. what was i doing here? I started to see tracer rounds coming between the vehicles from the left. I had been driving for 22 hours and i was not ready for this. I saw the vehicle in front of me start to fire in the direction of the fire, and i matched fire. Its funny that people say you never know what you will do when the rounds start coming back at you. its true. you just shut down, and, if you are lucky, you recieved good training that just takes over. the vehicle in front of me remained as motionless as it did the last time i checked, and the people coming out of the house were moving closer and closer to the vehicles in the convoy. one insurgent got about five feet from the passenger door of the truck in front of me. the medic in the passenger seat swung his shotgun out of the window and laid down great vengence and furious anger upon the man who was hell bent on killing him. the gun fire did not stop and my TC had gone through 3 ammo cans before the HET driver snapped back into reality. he pressed the pedal to the metal and we followed suit. we met up with the front part of the convoy about 3 miles down the road. we knew someone in the HET was hurt, and we were ready to provide as much aid as possible. Unfortunately, the civilian driving the truck had waited too long. A Staff Sergeant had been hit by a piece of shrapnel about the size of a California peach in his midsection. our first rate body armor is no match for a piece of metal moving that fast, and the staff was dead before the HET started moving again. we called for a medevac and a bird was enroute. 6 feet from the ground is a long way when you are moving deadweight. SGT Chase was a 5 foot something medic. Along with about 5 other medics, he stood at the base of the truck trying to figure out how to get this body out of the cab. Remember that trust that i mentioned earlier, he climbed into the cab, looped his arms under the staff's shoulders, looked back, and said catch me. he took a leap of faith, knowing that his fellow soldiers would be there to catch him. they prepared the body for pickup, and treated the driver for minor wounds.
The helicopter arrived about fifteen minutes after the call, and the casualty was loaded into the chopper. this ugly phase of our journey was over, but the night was still young. the HET platoon commander brought another person up to replace the TC and we were ready to roll. Unfortunately, no one had seen the driver. He had pulled a Keyser Soze' and he was gone. we could not leave an american in this hostile territory, even if he had run off. A group of soldiers were sent to search the surrounding area, outbuildings, and homes in an area where we were just attacked looking for this guy. 3 hours spent looking for him brought no fruit. the convoy commander callled back to the dust off and asked them to check the bird. The medic assured him that he was not in the chopper, but agreed to check just in case. When he came back on the radio, he informed us that the civilian driver had been found, curled up in the fetal possition in the back of the chopper. 6 medics, 2 pilots, and a convoy full of men had all missed him sneaking on to the chopper. that civilian punched his time card, and i am sure he was on the next flight home. 27 hours since i last slept. he wasted three hours of my time. I was mad, tired, and wanted to take a shower and wash the pain away. i would never be able to forget what i had just been through, but right now i wanted to wash all of the images out of my mind. ever since i joined the army, i wanted my chance to fight in this war, and now all i wanted was to be a little kid curled up on my mothers lap. safe from all danger. God i wish i could cry-why do i have to be a man at times like this.
we were still eight hours from our destination, we had just lost a soldier, and we all needed some rest. the convoy commander decided we would drive out as far into the desert as we could, the drivers would sleep while others took shifts on guard, and we would move out at first light. I dont know how i slept, but i found comfort in the cab of that HEMTT and i slept the best four hours of my life. when we got back on the road the next morning, we found that we were on the right track for an arrival at FOB Duke before lunch time. Insurgents had blown up every bridge leading into An Najaf the day previous-every one except the one we were headed for. I felt something jump inside me. A shower was calling my name...we continued to drive faster and faster towards our destination.
we made the last turn heading into the Marine base, and the Entry Control Point(ECP) was visible. I was so excited, we were almost there. Just before we arrived at the gate, the convoy commander made a left turn into a patch of sand. i thought this was normal. we were just going to get accountability before we rolled in the gate. boy was i wrong.
COL Dana J. H. Pittard, our Brigade Commander, wanted to name a FOB. In our brigade we were the Iron Dukes. Hence, FOB Duke. Instead of going to the Marine base-the one the had phones, showers, internet, a Dining facility, and a Post Exchange we were going to "rough it." I had not, nor had any of the other members of the team, on not having laundry facilities. this was about to get ugly.

Why is it when you are a kid all you want is to be dirty, but when you're an adult the prospect of being dirty is horrifying?

I felt like Pigpen-the cloud of dust and all...

technical difficulties

2006-11-22T01:19:00.000-05:00

sorry that i have not posted in a while. i have been unable to access the website to put my posts on, but you have been rewarded for your patience. here are the next two installments on the story-well worth the wait i hope. things here are much of the same. i am really excited to go home for leave. thank you leah for the package that you sent with the christmas decorations. its beginning to feel a lot like christmas, and even though you arent supposed to put up christmas decorations before thanksgiving is over i say poo-poo to that.
I miss you all very much and hope you enjoy the story half as much as i am enjoying writing it.
andrew

Boots on the Ground: A Soldiers story of the war in Iraq (part 4)

2006-11-22T01:17:00.000-05:00

When we arrived at FOB Scunion, this alien world that I was in felt a little more like a home...it was nothing like the home I had just left, but it was getting better. I was able to call home after the first few days had passed, and I let my family know that I had arrived safely. We moved into our transient housing, which we affectionately referred to as the "chicken coops" because the windows were chicken wire and the rafters were full of pigeons. The chicken coops were home, but left much to be desired. There was no climate control, it was winter in Iraq, and I was a dumb private who packed his sleeping bag in the connex-real smart...
Scunion was a small camp; you had to run twice around the wire just to make two miles. We had names for some of the buildings; the headquarters building was called the Taj Mahal because it was a tiered building that the leadership thought looked like a temple. We had the North Forty, which was a wide open space north of the North gate but still inside the wire. then there was the trash pile. There was literally a half-football field full of scrap metal, concrete, and trash that was piled up in the center of the camp. 4th Infantry division had done the impossible by making the other buildings on the FOB livable, but it was at the cost of a gigantic trash pile that now belonged to us. The battalion Sergeant Major did not like trash. I did not like the prospect of having to clean up the trash...but there were still a few aces up the sleeves. The hearts and minds campaign was about to begin and all of our lives were about to change.
The first week in Iraq was spent in a RIP (relief in place). This meant that our leadership was sitting in the right seat while the people we were replacing were driving...this is a way the army uses to actively train the newbie’s. I spent the first week mostly doing nothing. as I was a private, I had no responsibility and, until my leaders were finished training, I was without a job. So I did what I do best-I went trash digging. The saying is right-one mans trash is another mans treasure. I found so much stuff in the junk yard that I was ready to move into my quarters and start living the good life. There were wood boxes to stack as a dresser, ammo cans to store my personal hygiene items, wood to make a permanent bed-I hate sleeping on cots, paint, and many other smaller more useless items that I felt like I absolutely needed them.
As soon as the RIP was complete, the day came to bring the trail party of 4th ID to Balad Airbase. This would be my first time driving in our sector, and, although I did not know the route yet, in the coming months I would become very familiar with the trip to Balad. I was the driver of a 5 ton truck, loaded to the max with soldiers ready to go home. I was terrified of what was out there, and this fear was beginning to affect my better judgment. The road to Balad was a dangerous route, but I was more dangerous to the soldiers in back than the route could have ever been. This trip was where it stopped being a game and started to get real. The road up to Balad is full of potholes and dips. If you have ever traveled by 5 ton you would understand how this is not a good way to travel. The suspension is very stiff, and the vehicles don’t handle bumps and dips very well. I was too scared to fall back from the vehicle in front of me, I was not making wise decisions, and I almost launched a soldier out of the vehicle because I was taking the dips too fast. I almost killed another soldier because I was too scared to risk my own for their safety.
This attitude would change, but experience was all that I needed to change. During the first few weeks in Iraq, the chaplain passed out ID tags that had a bible verse on them that quickly became my favorite. Joshua 1:9, “I will be strong and courageous, I will not be terrified or discouraged for the Lord my God is with me wherever I go.” I would always say a quiet prayer before we rolled out the gate, and this particular verse was incredibly reassuring to me. The more that I prayed, the more I accepted the fact that I had no control over my fate, and this led to the calm resulting from accepting your death. I was ready to die each time that I left FOB Scunion, and I was thankful for each day that I came back. Every day was my last. I would call home infrequently. Each time I talked to my family it was painful. I didn’t want to admit that they could lose me at any time. It was easier not to hear their voices; email is much more impersonal. I almost killed a soldier, and now I was ready to die myself.
The trip to Balad became a bi-weekly occurrence. I made the trip so often that it haunted me in my dreams. The first month flew by, and there was so much going on that it was impossible to keep track of the day of the week. An Najaf had become a problem, and we became part of the solution. A team of soldiers from 3rd Brigade, 1ID were sent down to An Najaf to assist the marines in clearing out the city. I was a member of the team.
My supervisor came to me one night in early April and informed me that I would be going to Najaf for sixty to ninety days. This trip was going to change my life. This would be the beginning of a journey that I did not know I was embarking on, and this trip would have far reaching effects to my life and my future. This would be the trip that would make me a combat veteran. This was the day I thought that I was going to die, the day that I first saw death, and the day that I began to have unwavering trust for the soldier to my right and left.

Boots on the Ground: A Soldiers story of the war in Iraq (part 3)

2006-11-22T01:15:00.000-05:00

Kuwait was full of broken promises for the 1st Infantry Division. While we awaited our turn to depart north and join the battle, we were assured that none of our vehicles would go north of Kuwait without armor. At this point in the war, the insurgency was begining to use roadside bombs in their efforts to oppose the new order establishing itself in the Arab world. This was a deadly weapon, and this concerned a lot of troops and their families. Hearing the division commander assure us that we would not roll north without armor was calming but disconcerting. in the short amount of time that i had been in the army, i knew that this was just too good to be true. This convoy was perhaps the most frightened i had ever been for any trip in my life. I was headed into the valley of the shadow of death. I took a lot of time to pray. i was scared. its not like the kind of fear that you experience when watching a scary movie, this kind of fear is deep within your soul. it is almost painful where it touches you. i was scared for my life.
time passed, our training at the Udari Range Complex was completed and it was time. Our maintenance team had been working around the clock to fix as many of the problems with our vehicles before we hit the road. there were five serials in our convoy as we were trying to reduce the size of our convoy to a manageable amount. there were still more than forty vehicles per convoy and this is dangerous because you move too slow. I was in the last serial. we were the recovery group. if any vehicle broke down we were the ones that would pick them up. the first serials would not stop for any reason. we were briefed on the convoy two days before we rolled out. it was at this point in time that we were informed that there were not enough armor kits to accommodate all of our vehicles. we were instructed to put sandbags on the floorboards of our vehicles. all of these promises of world class equipment for our protection boiled down to a twenty-five cent sandbag. thanks a lot uncle sam...
0400 9 March 2004, we were awakened at an early hour to make the final preparations for our departure at 0700. This was it. months of preparation and training, classes, and exersizes and now we were actually going to cross the border into a combat zone. the chaplain gave us a prayer at 0600. it was still dark, so no one could see the fear on each others face. it was so palpable that you could taste it. no one was talking. we all had so much to say but no one was saying a thing. I climbed into my truck and waited. there would be a separation between each convoy, enough time for each convoy not to run up on the other. we weren't scheduled to leave until 0900, but we waited with engines running. the time flew by and we were on the road before too long. it was my first opportunity to see camels up close and not in a cage. it was like driving in america, but instead of cows you would see herds of camels. it was wierd, almost unnatural. we stopped at Norstar Convoy Support Center and fueled up two miles before the border crossing. this was the last chance to file for conscientious objector status. next stop, War.
There are signs painted on a concrete barriers just before the border, "Approaching the Iraqi border, Speedlimit, Drive it like you stole it!" This became our motto and practice, but not on this convoy. I think the fastest that we went on this trip was 35 miles per hour. the convoy was scheduled to take fourteen hours...but nothing in the army works quite as well as planned. Many of our vehicles were not as "battle ready" as they could have been and nearly forty vehicles in our battalion broke down along the trip. since we were the recovery element it was our job to pick them up. I was in a Heavy Expanded Mobility Tactical Truck (or HEMTT, said hemit). The truck had just come back from a rebuild and was a "new" truck. all this meant was that it was not battle tested. any time i come to a military vehicle and it does not have at least two to three leaks on the underside, that is not a truck i will drive. this time i did not have that option. besides the fact that i was a private, i was just as much of a "cherry" as this vehicle. my vehicle broke down approximately eight miles into Iraq. Bad fuel was the cause, and the effect was having to stop in hostile territory and drain the 154 gallon fuel tank. we did not have the luxury of environmental friendly disposal, and all of us were nervous about being stopped on the side of an iraqi highway. i opened the drain plug on the tank and let it pour onto the highway. in a twisted way, i was just returning the fuel to the source...the whole operation took about 20 minutes, and then we were back on the road. this would be the last time my truck would be the cause of a stop, but this would not be the end of the nightmare on our hands.
by the time we reached the Scania CSC (convoy support center), half of the vehicles in our convoy were towing another vehicle behind them. we thought that this was the end of the breakdowns, but once again we were wrong. Scania was everything i thought a movie about a war should be. there were hundreds of trucks parked in the staging area and the living area looked like something off of the TV show MASH. there were helicopter overflights constantly and I thought any minute "charlie" was going to come out of the palm groves and ambush us. i felt like an actor in some great movie about modern warfare, but this was not a hollywood movie set, and there was an enemy out there observing me right now. sometimes i wonder what he saw. what i looked like in those early days. I must have looked like a young, scared, sub-urban kid who somehow got lost on his way to college and now was fighting a war in some country half a world away...at least that is how I felt. we took some time to fuel up, rest up, and get ready for the next leg of the trip we were only halfway to our destination, and we were already hours behind schedule. This was turning into a fiasco, and the sun was getting ready to set.
as darkness crept up, I found myself pulling security as we recovered yet another broken down vehicle. as I gazed out on the landscape, everything looked so foreign. there were palm groves all over the place, and each town that we passed looked just like the drawings of villiges in bible stories of my youth...that is except for the occasional antennae for television or radio. i never thought that i would ever have been in the middle east as a tourist let alone as a member of a liberation army. what was i doing here? what did i do in my life that ended up with me in the driver seat of a fuel truck in the middle of a combat zone? what was i thinking? these questions haunted me as i sat there staring into the wide open spaces of this foreign land, and they would continue to haunt me for most of my tour. I was looking for answers, i was looking for direction, i was looking for the person who wanted me dead.
twenty-two hours after we left kuwait, we arrived at our designated rally point. we would sleep here for the night, and in the morning our comrades would pick us up and escort us to FOB Scunion. I dont think i have ever slept so rough in my life. it is impossible to fall asleep and be comfortable inside the cab of a HEMTT. somehow i got enough rest to function come wakeup, and i was never more alert than i was on the ride to Scunion. this would be my first experience driving in traffic. the escort told us that the only way you stay alive in this country is to "drive it like you stole it." he brifed us on the route, and told us to keep up-he had no intention of stopping. it is an incredible experience driving in rush hour traffic at 55 mph...especially when you dont have to pay for the damages you cause. I took my 10 ton truck over bombed out replacement bridges, through wall to wall traffic, and finally through the gate at FOB Scunion. I never felt so alive in my life. I was hooked. Adrenaline was my new drug, and I wanted more. My oportunity would come soon, but not soon enough. For now we rested.

Welcome to hell boys...

and the beat goes on...

2006-11-16T02:04:00.000-05:00

things are more of the same, my leave is soon, so i am excited. I really just want to see my nephews, but i guess others can be scheduled in during nap time...jk. MO you are right, but dont put anything on the web about it BBIW...B and L and N thanks for the birthday pics, he is adorable, but i am sure that cake was everywhere...cant wait to see you all.
Andrew

The fun of story telling...

2006-11-14T10:59:00.000-05:00

Thank you all for reading my story and giving me your kind comments, I have enjoyed writing it so much that i dont think i will stop at three-why put a number out there, ill just keep on writing until i get put in jail ;)
I have been busy, but not so much that i am getting worn out. R&R is coming soon, and i am keeping my eyes on the prize. I have a headache, so there wont be a long post today. I am still working on the next installment of "boots on the ground." I will post when i have enough to put up.
MO start thinking of a day which will live in infamy! ILYIMY ill see you soon.
andrew

boots on the ground, a soldiers story of Iraq (part 2)

2006-11-12T09:03:00.000-05:00

In February 2004, I arrived in Kuwait headed towards a yearlong rotation in Iraq. I deployed herre with a combat battalion heading to one of the worst provinces in the country. Insurgent violence was fracturing this once prosperous, largely Sunni Muslim province. The Province was crippled by war, fear of insurgency was holding the population captive. The community was crumbling around looting and sectarian violence. Citizens had been placed under a military imposed curfew, but many were still too afraid to leave their homes. Insurgent strongholds in Fallujah, An Najaf, and the small neighborhood outside the "Green Zone" in Bahgdad (dubbed Sadr City by the soldiers) were gaining strength and numbers, digging in for a long fight. Iraq was torn by violence and the people were weary of the promise of a bright future.the dust is the worst part of it all. Kuwait, a desolate, barren, sandy hell. the thing about the dust in kuwait is that it is a finer grade of sand than what you would find on a beach in America. It gets everywhere. you will open books and find dust. your crotch, ears, nose, eyes, nothing is safe from the dust. all of your electronics are trashed. flat, neverending desert is all that you see in kuwait.
the US Military made history in 2004. for the first time since WWII, Military Sealift Command and Air Mobility Command were put to the test with a massive troop and equipment rotation. 130,000 troops were rotated in and out of theater in a matter of months. Sealift command managed the rotation of nearly as many vehicles and other pieces of mission critical equipment. This troop rotation was done in conjunction with the R&R program, and other daily operations supplying troops at the front with supplies needed to fight the battle went on without pause. A Combined Forces effort resulted in a fresh force touching ground and taking the torch from a battle hardened but fatigued force. New camps were built all over the northern desert of Kuwait to support the influx of troops being trained at the Udari Range Complex. Large patches of Kuwait sand were groomed and prepared, tents were setup, dining facilities were built, and communications networks were established. The stage was set.
Enter 1st Infantry Division
February 14th, 2004-Valentines Day-an ideal day to separate husbands and wives, was the day chosen to deploy the 2nd battalion, 63rd Armor Regiment. Wakeup was 0300. First formation was at 0400 for weapons draw. that was the day that my relationship with Janet began-this is my rifle. although there are many others like it, this is my rifle-we moved our baggage to the hilltop gym for weigh in-478 lbs with me and all of my gear. around 0900 we loaded on the busses, said our last goodbyes, shed a few tears, and departed for the Nurnburg Airport where a plane was about to arrive to pick us up. the Flight to Kuwait takes about 14 hours from Germany. by the time we arrived in Kuwait it was dark, near midnight, and was cold. Winter in Kuwait is cold. It almost felt like the Germany that we just left. We inprocessed into theater which took about 2 hours, drank water, used the facilities, then boarded busses for the non-stop ride to Camp New York. Forced Hydration had been the policy since Germany (which meant that we had formations 5 times a day to drink water-kinda like a tea-party only not fun). About 3 hours into the drive i had to go to the bathroom so bad that it hurt. we had so much equipment on and with us that only my right butt-cheek could fit on the seat and that cheek was throbbing and numb by the time we pulled into the barren wasteland known as Camp New York. This was Home for the next three or so weeks.
The first few days at Camp New York were chaos. Lines everywhere. we would wake up at 0400 just to get in line for breakfast ( the doors didnt open until 0800), then after we got done with breakfast we would walk out the door and get in line for lunch (lunch started at 1200), then we would eat lunch and get in line for dinner around 1300 ( dinner didnt start until 1730), finally after dinner we would get in line to use the phones, internet, or Post Exchange. that was an average day at Camp New York until Halliburton built us a larger dining facility (one that could serve the entire camp in 1 hour was built in, literally, 2 days). Things changed after the DFAC was expanded, we now had nothing to do. we were so used to waiting in line that we were all confused when this fun game was over. Spades became a very popular game about that time. a lot of money was either won or lost while engaging in this Army wide pasttime.
Our boat was in an accident leaving the harbor in Antwerp, Belgium. This meant that we were on the extended stay of Kuwait. we had to wait another week for our vehicles to arrive before we could do the manditory Convoy Live Fire Excersize, which ended up being more redneck than any other training i have ever participated in since i joined the army. It consisted in driving down a dusty dirt road and shooting at 55 gallon drums and a couple burnt out cars. Ma and Pa Kettle would be proud...i certainly felt more ready to fight the insurgency because of this training. No seriously, you have no idea how dangerous 55 gallon drums are in Iraq, especially in large numbers. Dispite the lack of resources, the MPRI trainers in Kuwait were worth the time spent at the ranges. the training, although lacking in the reality department, was just what we needed to augment the excersizes and other activities conducted in Germany. We were prepared to fight an enemy that up to this point had been a paper target. Now it was real. from here on in we shoot without a script. The next step was the Convoy North.

and the land speed record goes to...

2006-11-12T01:12:00.000-05:00

things out here remain the same. it seems to me that everytime i am out of the states, life just flies by at break neck speed. it seems like just yesterday that i left the states, but so much has happened since then. i am excited to get home and see my nephews for the first time. it will be fun too be an uncle. it almost feels unreal, like it isnt really happening. i miss you all very much.

2 years, 5 months and 8 days...

2006-11-08T05:23:00.000-05:00

I really need a new job. they told me when i took this job that there would be a lot of travel (they didnt say that it would be to the worst possible locations imaginable), great benefits (they didnt say that it would be like pulling teeth to use them), and i would get to meet new and exotic people (they didnt say that these people would be trying to kill me...). I'm looking for something less dangerous, maybe underwater welding or ocean floor pipeline maintenance. any thoughts.

I have not had a chance to view the results of the elections, but would welcome your input in comments. let me know how things went.

Andrew

how sweet it is to be...

2006-11-06T01:59:00.000-05:00

Q-west Idol went off without a hitch. we took second place as a company, meaning one of out people took second place. we also took second place in the dodgeball tournament. what a loss. things are good here on my end. I am still waiting for pictures of my new nephew, but i suppose mother and son are doing well. no news is good news...i am continuing to write my story and i will post chunks as they get finished. i miss you all and hope all is well with you. leah, brian and noah-keep the pictures coming-patricia, jason, and cody-get the cameras out, i want some photographic proof of life :)
ILYIMYSWAK
Andrew

2 times in one year, can one uncle be so lucky?

2006-11-04T14:59:00.000-05:00

I am a happy Uncle once again...congradulations Jason and Patricia...I love you a lot and cannot wait to see Cody!!!
Andrew

Boots on the Ground...a soldiers story of the War in Iraq

2006-11-04T14:57:00.000-05:00

In a generation of Americans fixated with instant gratification it is no wonder why the War in Iraq leaves such a bad taste in the average citizen’s mouth. Operation Desert Storm has given the American people a false sense of reality that war is easy. An Over-confidence in the Military might of the US, although not misplaced, has generated unreal expectations for the military as a whole. It is in this attitude of Supremacy that the short comings in the war for Iraq become sharply focused and plainly evident. Understand this, we are fighting an enemy who remains a phantom menace, and remains focused on the total destruction of the western way of life. This, however, is not the average Iraqi. This enemy is not representative of a large demographic of Iraqi society. In fact, this enemy is not usually even Iraqi. What follows is the story of the Iraqi people, the truth about the battle that continues to rage on in this country and the story of what it is like to be an American living and working in this war torn country.
The average Iraqi rises before the sun, commutes to work, provides for their family, and socializes with their neighbor. They shake hands, make deals, and conduct their day to day business while a war rages on around them. The average Iraqi has a cell phone, satellite television, and just installed air-conditioning in his home. This is not a terrorist, just like you and I, these Iraqis have dreams of a bright future, memories of good days, and hope for the future that lay before them. But unlike you and I, these Iraqis also have nightmares. Fears of a government that terrorized, raped, imprisoned and held them hostage for so many years. This dark past has given the people of Iraq a drive to succeed, and it has given them hope for better days. Unlike the grim forecasts of political and military analysts tucked safely away from danger in the comfort of their newsrooms, the future of Iraq looks bright. There are many reasons why success of this Arab nation is on the horizon.
Thanksgiving 2003 was my first holiday away from home, and I was spending it in Germany, training for a yearlong rotation in Iraq. At the time is was a young soldier fresh out of basic training, and though I had not tasted war yet, I was eager to prove myself. I in-processed into US Army Europe while the unit I was assigned to was finishing a 45 day rotation at the Combat Maneuver Training Center and a 30 day rotation at the training center and ranges in Grafenwoer Germany. I spent two months in Germany preparing to deploy, partying, drinking heavily completely unaware of what lay ahead of me. Its sort of weird when you sit down by yourself and try to accept the fact that you might die. When I first found out that I was bound for Iraq, I didn’t know how to tell my family. My mother cried. I hate when decisions I make bring my mother to tears. Although the reaction was the same, these were not tears of disappointment, these were tears of fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of death. Secretly, I was sharing those same tears, but on the outside I was strong. My father started giving me advise, "Stay away from the married women," "walk worthy," "don’t do anything you would be ashamed of." I felt like I was terminally ill. Everyone was saying their last words. Honestly, I was looking on the whole thing from the outside. A bird’s eye view of my life.

back in the saddle...

2006-11-02T01:00:00.000-05:00

well the punishment is complete and i am back on the net. i will be putting the first part of my story on the blog tonight so stay tuned. I am alive, well, and busy as ever. i love you all and look forward to hearing from you.
Andrew

2006-10-21T10:52:00.000-04:00

[Website under review for OPSEC]

Snitches get stitches...

2006-10-19T10:34:00.000-04:00

well, it will have to wait for part one of the story. i was going to get it online tomorrow, but someone was complaining about having to work an eight hour day and our boss took away all days off. When will people in the army learn that complaining only makes it worse. Snitches get stitches...
anyways, today the enemy breached the FOB, and I was forced to take the boots on ground approach to solving the problem. about thirty insurgents were grazing inside the wire, and I was able to push them back into a full retreat. I have also added Shepard to my resume'. things today were chaotic. there is a new command in charge of us and as a result we are blessed with the opportunity of experiencing the learning curve once again.
ill try and get the first part posted asap.

Andrew

the daily show...only not the funny one on comedy central

2006-10-18T10:07:00.000-04:00

tonight or somewhere close to tonight is the night of power-please pray that the iraqis dont get any ideas tonight...
we found a truck with 3 130mm rounds in it today at the entry control point. the gate was closed for hours while EOD (explosive ordainace disposal) removed the threat from the gate area. not fun.
Anyways-patricia, i got your package today and had a great laugh at the t-shirt. the candy was a big hit too. i cant wait for pictures of the nephew, so hurry up and have him already!!!

ILYIMYSWAK

from Qayyarah west
Andrew

the latest and the greatest...

2006-10-17T09:29:00.000-04:00

things here in Qayyarrah west remain mostly the same...there have been the usual VBIED (Vehichle Born Improvised Explosive Device) threats, and the constant alert for direct attack on the FOB (Foward Operating Base). It was encouraging this week to see GEN Schoomaker flat out tell the press that troop levels would remain at 140,000 until 2010. it shows a significant change in press relations from the DA level...it was also encouraging to hear the President say that he would be open to a change in direction if the commanders on the ground thought that it would be prudent. it allows that commanders on the ground to look in to a whole other series of options to counter this insurgency and make this a more lethal fighting force, and a more secure democracy.

i reached a new level of boredom today. i sat and redesigned the Entry control point on paper about 20 times because i was just trying to stay awake...anyway, its just a small portion of my day.

I got your package today leah, it was Awesome to have pictures of noah to put up all over the room...keep them coming.
PS i love the mohawk ;)

more to follow-i am almost finished with part one
andrew

The days drag on, but the excitement builds...

2006-10-14T12:34:00.000-04:00

well things at the North ECP are the same as usual, but there is more of a buzz of what is about to happen. there is a new unit in charge of us and they are determined to improve the entry control point to make it more efficient, and more secure...
things are busy-we are at the height of ramadan, so there are curfews and other "safety" restrictions in place. it is harder for me to post, so please bear with me during this period of heightened awareness. thank you all for your kind updates, and please be sure to keep commenting...
Andrew