Friday, February 16, 2007

When i find myself in Times of Trouble.

Five miles outside of vegas when we broke down,
threw my keys inside the window and we never looked back.
Got all drunk and sloppy on a Greyhound bus,
we passed out all them loosers they were laughing at us.
I will never let them break your heart.
No i will never let them break me.
we got lost in phoenix seemed like such a long time,
seven months of living sweaty on those thin white lines.
did some time for selling acid to the wrong guy.
life just keeps on getting smaller and we never as why,
why there is no perfect place yes i know this is true,
im just learning how to smile and thats not easy to do.
i know there will come a day when we can leave and just go running away
we was broke outside of LA when the storms came.
i was working in New Jersey had to run in the rain,
we was happy talking dirty at that phone sex place.
life just keeps on getting better for us everyday.
you say there is no perfect place,
i say i know this is true.
we're just learning how to smile, and thats not easy to do
we both live for the day when we can run away
oh baby we can run away.
we can leave it all behind like we do everytime.
we both live for the day when we can run away.
no i will never let them break your heart.
no i will never let it break me.
five miles outside of vegas five years down the line.
we got married in the desert in the sunshine.
i can handle all the hell it happens everyday,
when you smile and touch my face
you make it all just go away.
yes i know there is no bigger pond,
i know theres never air.
we are just learning how to fall and climb back up again.
i know there's nothing perfect, i know there's nothing to loose
we are just learning how to live together me and you.
you know i live for the day when we you say baby lets just run away.
yes we can leave this place and run away.



its been a tough couple of weeks. Sometimes i feel myself being antisocial and finding solace in my ipod. its amazing to me how much of an impact music is in the life of humans. Music is affected by the social atmosphere, and the social atmosphere is affected by music. a symbiotic relationship that is so important. I know that my posts have seemed a little dark lately, but i have been hurting emotionally lately. I m just learning how to fall and climb back up again. It is difficult to loose a friend. its strange how it impacts you in so many different ways.
somtimes i sit back and i really wonder "what are we doing here?"
It always makes me think of a story from my first tour in iraq. We had been working a tough week in August. The Brigade commander had driven up to the Balad bridge for some reason, and he decided that the Hesco Bastions that were emplaced for force protection purposes were not pretty enough and wanted them replaced with concrete barriers. This meant that Support Platoon would have the wonderful task of doing the actual work. 18 hour days in 140 degree weather is not pretty. on the third day of barrier emplacement, we had been out for 14 hours in full battle rattle, sweating our asses off, when i lost it. I couldnt do it any more. I sat down on a jersey barrier to take a little break and drink some hot water (i had no other options).
There is something universal about the spirit of a child. they will do anything to make a few dollars, and usually this means a lemonade stand. At the Balad Bridge there was a small "haji" mart, a lemonade stand of sorts. The little kids at the bridge would sell dvds, sodas, and other small trinkets to passing convoys all day long. for the whole week that we were working at the bridge, these kids were trying to sell stuff to us all day. Well, this particular day i was fed up. the heat had gotten to me, the work had gotten to me, and I was just overwhelmed.
I sat down on the barrier and was taking a break. one of the kids just sat down next to me, and I expected to have him ask me for money or try to sell me some piece of crap made in china. I was about to tell him to buzz off, when he said, "thank you." I was stunned into silence. Thank god i was unable to speak, because it gave this young man a chance to continue speaking. "Thank you for coming here and removing Sadaam Hussein. My whole family loves America. My village loves Americans. Sadaam Hussein was a Bad man. Now that he is gone my family has hope for a better life." This hit me like a train wreck. Here i was just about to tell this kid to beat it, and He was an angel that just communicated a message to me from God. Stay the course. Finish what you have started. When I was ready to quit, when i had lost all hope, when I was down in the dumps, this kid reached out and communicated a message of hope for me. Every time i think about that story, it gives me the energy to finish what i have started. That day at the bridge every sacrifice that i, and my comrades in arms, had made was worth the blood, sweat, toil, and tears. We made a difference in that one child's life.

As The debate over this war continues, Just keep in mind that we made a difference. Regardless of what is being said on the television, in the halls of congress, and in the fierce protests against this war-Know that we made a difference in one child's life, and we gave his entire family the hope for a brighter future.

4 comments:

Bob said...

Hooah.

Awesome, Drew. Thanks for telling that story. :-)

Hang in there, man.

Anonymous said...

I love you babe. Tom is coming for dinner tonight. I'll get the scoop on his trip to Chicago. Tuesday we are traveling to Denver to visit with Melanie and the boys--they are here over President's weekend--snow mobiling in Winter Park.

ILY XXXOOO MO

Anonymous said...

I am glad that your ipod gives you some relief. I remember how the HBO show Sex and the City gave me relief during my short 12 months in the desert. Well that and 2 hours a night in the gym. Nothing like 12 months w/o your husband... Ah, the days of simple relief :)

I am reading through the Old testiment right now and finding new insight into the complete holiness of God. How great is our God, and greatly to be praise! I think this verse in Psalms is encouraging and has been a verse I think about often the last couple of weeks - "The law of the LORD is perfect, revieving the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple; the precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; the commandments of the LORD are pure, enlightening the eyes; the fear of the LORD is clean, enduring forever; the rules of the LORD are true, and righteous altogher." Psalms 19:7-9.
No matter my situation, no matter my state of mind, the word of God is sure and true. It is THE light for my path.
We joined the YMCA and now take Noah swimming 2 to 3 times a week. He has "big" boy swimming pants/tunks and is so, so cute. He jumps off the edge of the pool into the water with the closed eye smile. It makes me really happy.
You will love swimming with him at the lake in September.
ILY and IMY
Lolly

Patricia said...

I think about you often and pray for you more. I too find myself unhappy at work, but find solice in the fact that I do make a difference everyday. Hang in there, it won't be much longer till you have to deal with the stress of the "real" world. ILY

Pete